


Doctors

by Demonwriteryang



Category: BNA: Brand New Animal (Anime)
Genre: Aged-Up Character(s), Assistant! Michiru, Doctor! Shirou Ogami, Dorks failing in love so Nazuna has to step in, Eventual Smut, F/M, Fluff, Happy Ending, Michiru is oblivious and a dork, My First Work in This Fandom, Nazuna and Michiru are good friendos - Freeform, Nazuna is just chilling, Nina is scary at times, Oneshot but I might make it longer, Shirou is bad at feelings, Unresolved Romantic Tension, Unresolved Sexual Tension, Why Did I Write This?, i'll tag as we go, this plot keeps changing at a random rate
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-07-09
Updated: 2020-11-11
Packaged: 2021-03-05 01:07:07
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 9
Words: 21,680
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25155967
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Demonwriteryang/pseuds/Demonwriteryang
Summary: An AU where Shirou is a doctor with a hardly good at her job assistant Michiru and they save lives while trying to hide their sickeningly obvious attraction from one another.
Relationships: Alan Sylvasta & Shirou Ogami, Hiwatashi Nazuna & Kagemori Michiru, Kagemori Michiru/Ogami Shirou, Nina Flip & Michiru Kagemori
Comments: 28
Kudos: 105





	1. Why do I keep thinking of him?

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Assistant doctor Michiru Kagimore to Doctor Shirou Ogami has been having strange thoughts these past few months concerning her superior.

"Sooo, ... was last week fun?", hopefully glancing at him passing the ashtray closer to him.

_'I wonder if he enjoyed it. I mean it's my first time hosting a get-together.'_

"It wasn't bad.", he replies without delay putting the blunt out.

"That's not an answer Shirou."

He grabs his morning coffee and leaves.

"A thank you would've been nice!", yelling after him dropping into my chair.

_'So rude. It's not like you were the one hosting the party this time.'_

* * *

_**Last Week's Party at Michiru's apartment:** _

"That's way too embarrassing!", Nazuna laughs while Nina styles my hair.

"You ran all the way to work in your pajamas and didn't even notice?"

"Now that's just sad Michiru.", wiping away her nonexistent tears taking another sip from the can she shuffles on the poke-a-dot rug.

"It's just that I was late!", whining at her teasing words poking at my plate of food.

"Still!", she's snorting her drink as she continues laughing.

"Tell me Nina is that embarrassing?", all the attention reverts to the bubbly influencer with an eye for shiny things.

"Well the fact you didn't notice you were in your PJs is a bit unsettling.", she notes the last part probably meant for her head.

"See what I mean? Even Nina agrees.", the smirk she's broadcasting frustrates me to no end.

"Stop looking down on me."

"You and Shirou always act like I'm dumber than you two."

The snort from the outside pisses me off even more.

"But that doesn't mean your dumb Michiru! People make mistakes. But a blunder like that is unsettling.", trying her best to remedy the damage down to my pride Nazuna laughs wildly in the background.

"Shirou you agree, right?", we're all staring at the thirty-year-old as he smokes outside.

"People make mistakes. But that bratty woman makes far to many for them to be considered "mistakes". At this point it's a wonder she's still alive."

Nazuna laughed the hardest at that comment while Nina tried her hardest to hold me back from pummeling him.

"Are you calling me stupid! Huh?! Is that it?!"

"It's okay Michiru I'm sure he was just joking around."

"Not really."

"What was that Shirou!"

"Michiru calm down!"

"Oh, this is comedy.",Nazuna's laughing, Nina's restless attempts at peace, and our ongoing bickering all made for a very noisy party.

.  
.  
.

"That's not fair! Of course, you'd pick your own song!", pouting at the hundred out of a hundred score she racked up complete with dancing.

"Are you sure your not just mad that I just beat your score?", smugly falling on the bed ruffling the pillows and blankets placed on my bed.

"Of course I'm not."

 _'Am I tipsy?'_

A warm feeling buzzing feeling persists throughout my head.

"Where's Nina?", groggily looking around for the eye-catching ponytail of aqua colored hair.

"Behind you, she's sleeping on your beanbag.", indeed she was dozing off her legs dangling.

"Oh.", softly whispering crawling towards the table riddled with snacks, takeout, and spilled over beer cans I grab mines. Sipping on whatever I can find.

A content and warm silence rest over the both of us the only noises are my sips and Nazuna's phone's notifications.

"Hey Nazuna?", breaking the silence.

"Hmm?"

"Did Shirou go back to his apartment?"

"Oh? And why do you want to know?", the smirk she's sending me looks so condescending like she knows something I don't.

_'And I don't like that one bit.'_

"B-Because he's my boss and superior dumbie! Get your head out the gutter.", her lecherous expression implied something I didn't want to be apart of.

Chuckling she eventually lets up answering the question.

"Yeah, he left. He also said that you'd better wake up on time tomorrow morning, otherwise, he'll deduct that from your pay."

_'Of course, he would say something like that. Damn devil.'_

"Oh yeah, what about you Nazuna, are you staying over?"

She takes a while to answer before getting off the bed the covers falling off.

"Nope. I have practice tomorrow so I need to wake up extra early."

_'Oh yeah. She's an idol and has another life outside of us.'_

"Then can you take Nina with you?", pointing over at her.

"Hmm.", observing her closely she agrees reaching to grab both their coats and other belongings.

"Just let me call a taxi."

A few minutes pass by and she gives me the thumbs up.

"Alright, the taxi's here. So help me get her out into the taxi Michiru."

Nodding the both of us take one of her arms and carefully carry her down the stairs.

"Careful these are some long stairs."

"I know I know.", reassuring her I focus on carrying Nina down without tumbling while we all walked down.

Eventually, after a few blunders, we brought Nina down to the bottom of the stairs no injuries gained.

"Come on Nina say goodbye to Michiru.", waking her up slightly Nazuna places her inside the open taxi door already having paid the driver.

"Mhm. Bye Michiru.", she wasn't in it her words drowsy looking very sleepy.

"Bye Nina.", hugging her before she turned over falling back into sleep I address Nazuna next.

"See you both tomorrow."

"You too Michiru.", pinching my nose teasingly she releases it soon walking to the other side.

Waving back widly at the fleeting taxi I start heading back into the apartment complex. Stopping in front of the door next to mines I place my hand on the door.

"Shirou? Are you sleeping at the clinic again?"

I'm met with silence and come to the conclusion my neighbor wasn't around.

"Goodnight then.", it's soft and insane but I can't help whispering to the empty room walking back into mines shutting the door closed.

___

"Michiru wake up!", turning back to Nazuna the annoyed look on her face shows I must have not been listening to whatever she was saying.

"You invited me to spend your break with you. So why are you spacing out now?", the worry is well hidden but years of being friends with her had trained me to better understand her emotions.

_'I keep thinking about Shirou a lot these days, It's weird and just strange.'_

Instantly an image of Shirou staring at me ridiculously close to the point I could kiss him forms in my head.

_'He's your boss damnit! Get your head out of the gutter Michiru.'_

"It's just that Shirou didn't come back to his apartment last night. It's not good to be sleeping at the clinic all the time but he keeps doing it even when I tell him it's not good."

"Argh! Sometimes he just makes me so angry! Why doesn't he ever listen to me?"

Nazuna just stares silently listening to my rant before pulling her straw out her mouth.

"You like him."

_'What?'_

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm redoing this a bit sorry about any confusion.


	2. Why do I care?

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Shirou's been really acting strange these days and Michiru just won't let it go.

"You like him."

_'What?'_

"Huh?"

"Shirou. You keep staring at him and every time we meet it's always Shirou this. Shirou that. etcetera."

_'The fact you won't admit it and are this ignorant of each other's feelings is what pisses me off the most.'_

"W-What are you t-talking about?"

_'She's fiddling her thumbs again, just how oblivious can you be Michiru?'_

Sighing the pink-haired woman pointed her straw at her blush riddled friend.

"Keep denying it all you want but it's the truth Michiru."

"No, it's nottt! I don't like him Nazuna!", Michiru whined embarrassed.

 _'I don't like him! My heart doesn't beat faster when he notices something I did well and - and -and... I don't like him!'_ , her internal argument was very disheartening especially with how her thoughts were written all over her face.

"You like him and you know it.", pointing at her blushing face she made pretend kissy lips.

"Nazuna that's not funny!"

Nazuna's cackling could be heard throughout the park as she continued teasing her friend.

* * *

_'Nazuna must be really bored these days if she keeps making those sorts of jokes.'_

Placing the snacks down I head over to Shirou's office. The flowery card hanging over the door surprises me on the way in.

_'When did we get this?'_

Flowy writing spells something out that I just can't comprehend no matter how many times I re-read it.

_'Is that a, J? Uh, I'll just ask later.' groaning in frustration I place the sign back in its original position._

_'Knock Knock'_

"I'm coming in."

Taking the silence for a _'yes'_ I push the door open and he's seated at his desk writing down something.

_'What's he doing?'_

"Do you need anything? The sign outside clearly says I'm not to be disturbed."

_'Oh, so that's what it said.'_

"Um, did you write it?"

"Yes."

_'Oh my God, he looks so serious as he says it! He writes so flowy like.'_

"What?"

"Huh? Nothing."

"No, it's defiantly something you have that smug look."

_'Shit. He's catching on.'_

"It's nothing."

Sighing he returns back to what he's doing.

"What did you need then?"

"Ah- Right! I did a quick look at inventory and it seems we're running low on bandages and syringes."

"Is that all?"

"...", thinking deeply nothing comes up.

"No, not rea-w-what are you doing?!"

He's so close to me out faces nearly touching.

"Do you have a fever?", the serious look he has does nothing better to remedy the situation.

The pounding of my heart seems so loud that I wonder if he can hear it too. His pale hand pressed lightly on my forehead bringing himself down slightly to reach my eyes.

_'Close. Way to close.'_

"W-what no!"

"Are you sure?", he retracts his hand the answer not enough to satisfy his curiosity.

"Yes, I'm sure."

"Well, that's good then. A sick assistant isn't good."

"If that's all then you can leave.", he heads back to his desk already observed in work.

"Right."

Letting myself out I head towards the bathroom briskly walking and lock myself in. Clasping my hands together thoughts rushing back and forth.

_'Calm down you were just taken by surprise that's all.'_

The heart beats took a while but eventually, they slowed to the point they weren't noticeable. Exciting the bathroom the question of why my heart started beating so excitedly continues to persist throughout the day.

* * *

"Assistant!"

"Yes?!", she answered pulling up in the room.

"Where are the results?"

"Ahh, they're still printing."

His glare caught her off guard making her feel nervous. Similar to how prey felt under the eyes of their hunter.

"But I'm sure they're done now!", nervously she reassured him.

_'What's with him?'_

"Well?", he asked irritated.

"Pardon?"

"Get them."

Recoiling at the harsh tone she nodded and headed towards the printer room.

"Here they are."

Upon her return he merely took the papers she handed refusing to acknowledge her existence.

_'That was rude, maybe he's having a bad day. Yeah, probably it.'_

Satisfied with her own answer she went on hoping his mood lifted. Unknown that his mood would only worsen over the next few months.

The following month passed by and the times Michiru saw her boss become less and less frequent. At work, he'd hole himself in his office and only ask for her when He needed something. Right after he soon stopped attending their get-togethers at the end of the week going as far as to say that he had other obligations.

The one time she grew curious and asked him about these "obligations" he nearly locked her out of the clinic.

_"And what are these other plans?"_

_"Not your business."_

_"It defiantly is! You're my damn boss and if you don't tell me where the hell you sneak off to how-"_

It was a swift end to her probing questions and she just left him to his own devices. That was how they functioned for the next two months brushing one another off.

But eventually, she couldn't keep her worry undercover and began meddling in his affairs once again.

* * *

"Shirou's still acting weird. So we have to stop this."

"Uh, ... Michiru."

"Yeah?"

"Why aren't you telling Nazuna this?"

Both of us are at a cafe that Nina tends to frequent talking over the most recent interactions at the clinic.

"Because she'll say I like him and that's why I'm so involved."

Nina leans in showing a _'hopeful'_ expression.

"Is it-"

"No, it's not true.", The disappointed look she gave wasn't hidden.

It wasn't the first time someone had seemed to think I liked the guy these days and it didn't seem like it'd be the last time either.

"But Michiru you dragged me out here on your lunch break so we could discuss why your boss treats you differently and actively goes out his way to avoid you?"

"Yes."

_'Isn't that normal?'_

"Michiru most employees would care to a certain degree but your far above that degree."

"Why wouldn't I be?", rising from the chair frustrated listing my points.

"I mean you're probably right. That's not a good enough reason to care. But, he doesn't sleep in his apartment anymore. Every time I walk in he's always sleeping on the couch now for two months and a half. That just can't be right."

"Well does he complain about it?", sipping her latte she speaks smoothly.

"... No.", I admit disheartened the rules shifting knowing I've already lost the argument.

"Then it's not bad. It's just a new decision he's made."

Sitting back down I listen to her starting to see reason.

"You may not like that decision but it's not yours to make. And the whole avoiding you thing might just be a misunderstanding on your part. You know the two of you argue a lot."

"... Yeah, we do that."

"Then it's probably that. Invite him to next week's get together. Nazuna and I will clear out so you can talk is that okay?"

"But what if he says no? Or fires me because I won't stop?"

The smile on her face isn't as nice as all the other ones.

"If he says no then keep trying but if he does fire you over something like that then I'll take care of it."

' _I'm a bit concerned now.'_

But as quick as that dark aura came it departed twice as fast.

"Now let's do something else.", paying the bill she gets up looking excited.

Plastering a smile thankful for her words of help I can't lose the nagging thoughts in my head that say it's not just a simple argument.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I feel that as I continue churning stuff out I keep writing smaller. Edit: Redid this chapter and again sorry for any confusion.


	3. Memories

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A lot of flashbacks and memories of a happier time.

_'Hehe, just you wait Mr. Ogami I'm going to leave a lasting impression on you.'_

_The plan was to finally meet with her superior. Having never seen him once during the welcoming party she'd had to contend with the constant stream of apologies from her new co-workers._

_"Sorry, Michiru he's just so busy these days."_

_Melissa had apologized relentlessly for her superior's attitude while Michiru constantly reassured her that it was okay and she held no ill will towards her unseen boss._

_At the time there hadn't been much thought at the fact her new boss never showed his face to her. But after a few weeks of working curiosity quickly started to knock._

_Questions of what he looked like and why he never came out of his way to directly meet with her plagued her working hours before eventually, she let the monster that was her curiosity inside._

_'I'll go out and meet him.'_

_That was how she Michiru Kagemori had ended up here awaiting the arrival of that very same man._

_'hehe.'_

_'When we meet he's gonna be all like, nice to meet you Ms.Kagemori and I'll be all like nice too -'_

_"What are you doing?"_

_Jumping in fright awoken from her delusions a white-haired man stared down at her his height the first thing she noticed before realizing that a blackbird was settled on his shoulder._

_'What a weird guy bringing a bird inside a hospital.'_

_"I'll ask again what are you doing here?"_

_'I've never seen this guy before. Probably another worker.'_

_"None of your business now butt out!"_

_Waving him away annoyed her focus shifted back to the target at hand._

_'Just you wait.'_

_._   
_._   
_._

  
_'When's Mr.Ogami going to get her?'_

_Several minutes had ticked by and steadily she was growing more and more irritated._

_'Just where is the guy and when is that weirdo with the bird going to leave?'_

_Looking over at the person in question she found him nursing another cup of coffee while lightly scratching his bird._

_"Kuu," it appreciably sighed._

_'Again what a weirdo that's his second cup of coffee.'_

_Sensing her eyes on him he narrowed his cool blue eyes at her in annoyance._

_"What?"_

_In response to his irritated tone, she childishly gave him the middle finger._

_"Nothing."_

_'This plan is going absolutely nowhere.'_

_Peeling back from in front of the door she started on the path to her office._

_'I'll come back tomorrow. I can't ignore my job any longer just to meet some random bozo.'_

_"Hey, Michiru."_

_"Hey Jem," murmuring at the messy redheaded man discontent with the failure of her previous quest._

_"You okay?"_

_"Yeah just tired I guess."_

_"Alrighty then."_

_She was further ahead before she could hear what he said next._

_"Nice to see you Mr.Ogami."_

_Harshly turning around the sight of Jem talking to the pale-skinned stranger stopped Michiru dead in her tracks._

_'H-He's Mr.Ogami?'_

_Embarrassment at her initial conduct starts to wash over her at the fact she'd brazenly told her boss to buzz off from his own office._

_Along with the fact she'd flicked the bird at him and called him a weirdo on multiple occasions._

_'S-Shit.'_

_'I n-need to apologize.'_

_Stealing a glance at the clock she started running back to her office remembering their were still piles upon piles of work sitting at her desk._

. . .

"-Michiru?"

Waking up from the daydream the familiar aspects of her office stand to remind her she's still at work.

"Hey, Michiru?"

"Yeah?"

Tiredly facing their secretary _(and her landlord)_ Melissa another pressing thought interrupts.

_'I'm going to need a new one soon.'_

Cringing at the very noticeable bite marks all over her black pen.

"Michiru are you okay?"

"Yes, I am Melis-"

An unexpected and embarrassingly loud yawn interrupts the conversation drawing the attention of everyone in the room.

"J-just tired," a heavy blush starts to coat her face humiliated at the fact her co-workers had heard such a thing.

Smiling Melissa continues taking the sudden shyness as a cue to ignore the yawn.

"Shirou requested that you bring him these files up to his office."

Placing them on top of a stack of papers next to Michiru she waits for the rambunctious girl to voice her opinion.

"Of course I'll get right on it."

"Alright," smiling softly like she knew something that Michiru obviously didn't know _(why was everyone doing that anyway?)_ she continued back to her seat in the front lobby.

_'This might just be my chance to talk to Shirou.'_

**_"Then it's probably that. Invite him to next week's get together..."_ **

The words that Nina had told her started to echo inside her head in tune with the echoing click-clack of her heels.

* * *

Tightly gripping the files I continue onwards towards his office determined. 

_'Alright. When I hand in these papers I'm going to-'_

"A-Ah!"

Forcibly shoved out my head the fact that the floor is coming to close in contact with me stares me dead in the eyes.

Instinctively bracing myself for impact minutes pad and it never comes.

Noticing the firm grip on my arm the police inspector Mr.Yuji shoots a concerned look over his shoulder at me.

"Are you okay Ms.Michiru?"

"Yeah, sorry about that."

Looking down the cause for my trip down to the ground looks to be the heels I'd only recently started wearing because of Nina.

_'Last time I'm ever wearing these deathtraps again I swear!'_

"It's nothing just be more careful."

Releasing me from his hold he immediately turns to depart.

"Of course!"

Thankful for his interference something catches my eye.

Taking a quick look at a paper peeking out from one of the files surprise flushes through.

_'Didn't we admit this patient just a few days ago? And didn't he clear out with a full check of health yesterday?'_

Curiosity overcoming me I start to look through the papers not understanding anything.

_'Why does he want the files on patients we've released with a clean bill of health months ago?'_

Milling throughout them still understanding nothing the original task of handing them in starts to fade.

That is until I catch a quick glimpse at the clock. 

"Shit I'm late!", panic surges through as I frantically gather all the papers into their original filling praying he won't notice any changes.

_'He's ridiculously good at catching things like this.'_

* * *

_If any onlookers had been walking pass they would have seen a dark-haired woman hiding behind the potted plant with a rather determined yet nervous look in her eyes._

_'This is it! I'll apologize and pray he doesn't fire me.'_

_Yeah, that was all she Michiru Kagemori could come up with a person who'd always scoffed at praying for things and always yelled that if you wanted something go get it and damn the consequences._

_'Oh, how the mighty have fallen.'_

_She thought embarrassed that she'd become like those people._

_"I can see you Ms.Kagemori."_

_Squeaking at his sudden appearance I once again gave him a one-over noticing that Kuroo was once again with him._

_A bag of birdseed in one hand a mug of coffee in the other._

_'S-shit.'_

_"H-Hi Mr.Ogami I just needed a, a - pen!"_

_"A pen?"_

_"Yep?"_

_"From my office?"_

_"Yes!"_

_"..." the silence hung over us both before I break it._

_"And about my behavior the last time we met I apologize!"_

_We both continued to stare at one another before he gave up sighing as he lightly pushed me out of his way._

_Once inside his office, he flashed back sneer._

_"I don't mind your previous behavior I however would appreciate it if you'd stop stalking my office."_

_The slam of the door resonated throughout the empty hallway._

_Taken by surprise at the sudden loud noise his harsh words started to sink in._

_Suddenly rage replaces my surprise anger at how he'd dismissed me along with that endearing sneer he'd shoved right in front of my face._

_'I'll get you back just you wait!'_

_. . ._

It'd been one of my first few meetings with the ever so frustrating doctor that was Shirou Ogami and a memory that I treasured greatly.

Pushing those sentimental thoughts to the back of my head my focus shifts back to the request he made to bring these files.

_'I can talk to him another time right now he asked me for some files.'_

_'Some really shady files.'_

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This took a long time to write I wanted to make this longer but then it stopped looking right so the rest will become the next chapter. Sorry about the long wait. Also the plot is rapidly changing so I also apologize for that to.


	4. P-Profesor Alan?!

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Some more memories and some actual action to jolt us from this slow pace.

  
_There were days where he just wasn't exactly there. Half the time his body would be in the room but his mind would wander elsewhere._

_Today wasn't any different._

* * *

_"Shirou."_

_Nothing but silence would greet her as he continued to stare into oblivion or at whatever the hell had garnered his attention for this long._

_Today it was the void as he stared at the white wall on his left._

_"Shirou?"_

_Doing her best to coax him out of his trance she waved her hands in front of his face, trying to create a reaction._

_Any other time he probably would have stared up at her with his eyes narrowed and a frown telling her to knock it off._

_But she got absolutely nothing instead._

_Growing annoyed she stopped trying to play nice upholding this fake charade of sincerity._

_"Shirou!"_

_"Yes?" waking up from whatever trance he'd been induced in he snarled taken aback by her noise._

_"What did you call me in for?", trying to reign the anger she felt at the moment she refocused her mind back on the mission at hand._

_Taking a few minutes to understand what nonsense she was spouting today he remembered asking Melissa to send her in when he was just barely awake._

_"When you go for your break could you pick up something from the police station for me?"_

_Staring at him unamused she decided to bite._

_"And why can't you do it? It's my break after all."_

_A familiar condescending gleam sprouted in his eyes a smirk being pulled on his lips._

_A normal expression that would have scared her shitless made her relax in ease._

_It'd been a long time since she could feel at ease with this man without constantly worrying about him._

_She greatly missed this fleeting sense of normalcy seeing his smirk fade back into his signature frown._

_"If you still want to get paid I suggest you go right now."_

_It took a while for her to understand his words and when it dawned on her the full meaning behind them all hell broke loose._

_"W-What the? That's illegal and mistreatment of power!"_

_Pointing an accusing finger in his face she couldn't believe he'd resort to these tactics once again._

_"Not in my world it isn't."_

_"That's a weak argument and you know it!"_

_"And you refusing to go because it's your break is a better argument?"_

_With that one question, he had silenced all her words of protest, and knowing he'd won she reluctantly gave in._

_"Fine, I'll do it."_

_Walking towards the door agonizingly slow she tried to draw this out until he put an immediate stop to it._

_"And if you still want a job I'd suggest you go right now."_

_Straightening up immediately with the prospect of her only source of income being toyed with by a madman she broke into a wild sprint._

_"I'll be on my way, sir!"_

_"Look for Inspector Yuji. He'll know what it is."_

_"Yes sir!"_

_Forcibly slamming the door she cursed him out with every single vile word she could think to describe his extortion none the wiser of his light chuckles of amusement._

_God, she could be the most naive woman he had ever gotten the chance to meet. It was probably what made her so pitiable and yet so hopelessly cute in his eyes._

_Dann, maybe he did need to sleep if he was having thoughts like these._

**_____ **

_"I'm back Shirou."_

_Upon opening the door, she saw him settled in his chair arms crossed over his chest._

_'What is he doing this time?'_

_Rolling her eyes in annoyance she found it quite rude that he didn't even have the decency to at least acknowledge her presence._

_"Shirou."_

_His response was silence once again, but she was used to it inching closer curiosity nagging at the back of her mind._

_"Shiro-"_

_"Oh."_

_Softly speaking she noticed he was asleep snoring so lightly in a way that made it seem like he wasn't even sleeping._

_'He looks nice like this.' she noticed taking the time to look more closely at her sleeping superior._

_When he was asleep she found he looked much softer. The hard creases in his brows smoothing out to make the bags under his eyes appear more pronounced._

_'He looks so much more relaxed.'_

_"You know if you have so much time to stare at me then you can at least clean my office."_

_Jumping away from him fiercely surprise taking ahold of her he glared at her a scolding already on his lips._

_"Well?"_

_"What?"_

_He could feel his headache coming back at full speed as he recounted their past conversation for her._

_"Did you get the journal?"_

_"Oh! As a matter of fact, I did."_

_Placing the maroon colored journal in his outstretched hand she started to leave before he stopped her once again._

_"And where are you going?"_

_"Back to my office?"_

_She was confused now, didn't she just fulfill his request?_

_"And this office will clean itself up?"_

_"That's not even apart of my job description!"_

_"You sure it's not or would you like to reread your resume again?"_

_"I didn't even ask for this job! I was recommended here."_

_"And yet your still here."_

_"Okay, now that's just rude."_

_"Alright, I'll mark that as insubordination and slander."_

_"Wait! Wait!"_

_Slamming her hands down on his desk she stopped him from reaching for the sheet of paper he was starting to pull out._

_"I'll do it."_

_Nodding he pushed the paper back in its place in another one of his files._

_'How does he know where everything is?'_

_"Jerk."_

_"Did you say something?"_

_"Nothing!"_

_She looked like a puppy he chuckled at how she jutted her lip out pouting._

_"You're even worse like this you know."_

_Raising a brow in surprise he nonchalantly waved her away._

_"Maybe."_

_"You mean yes."_

_"Assistant."_

_"It's Michiru."_

_Seeing his hand reaching for the paper again she stopped the meaningless banter immediately._

_"I'm going I'm going!"_

___

_"Uhhh, this is stupid."_

_Throwing another coffee bag inside the growing bag of trash she grumbled at his growing crippling caffeine addiction._

_'Since when did he start to drink this much?'_

_At best he'd usually gulp down three cups and that alone was on a hectic day._

_But ten cups?_

_Now that was plain ridiculous._

_'And he can still sleep.' sparing another glare at his working form she immediately went back to cleaning realizing that staring at him wouldn't get the reaction she wanted with how focused he was on reading the journal she'd delivered._

_Throwing out his empty takeout bags in disgust accompanied by Kuro's nearly empty bags of birdseed she could confirm he'd picked up some bad traits._

_"I deserve a raise for doing all this," grumbling while struggling to hold the near to combusting plastic trash bag in her grasp she thought of all the demands she'd make after cleaning this place up. Those thoughts were the only thing keeping her company as the sun gleamed through the window illuminating the room._

_Dropping the bag into the gray trash bin out back a light sheen of sweat running down her forehead into the insides of her shirt she grinned impishly tired and yet so relaxed._

_"Done."_

_Pride inflating her chest she skipped back to his office._

_____

_"Oh," giggling lightly at the cacoon his piles of paper had made around him she came closer._

_"Now this is funny," bringing her phone out she started taking pictures._

_'The perfect blackmail material.'_

_Oh, Nazuna would be proud of her if she could see this._

_After capturing a sustainable amount of pictures she started to separate his papers._

_It **was** the least she could do after all._

_'As funny as this is he should really start taking better care of himself.'_

_With that thought in mind, she continued to separate the notes into their respective files until her fingers touched the journal._

_'What's so important about this thing anyway?'_

_Curiosity peaking once again she pulled it out turning the cover in interest._

_She didn't get that far sadly freezing once hearing the drowsy groans and shifting noises of her superior. Hastily placing the journal back into its place on the newly cleaned desk she ran out already seeing him start to stir._

_'Shut.'_

_Pulling back from her spot next to him she placed everything back into its original place slightly running out._

_Panting shallowly the grip on her shirt tightened with each pang of fear and guilt she felt._

_'Let's how he didn't notice.'_

_Quickly looking around the empty hallway she broke into a run putting the incident far behind her as she started to grow annoyed realizing that her break had just been wasted._

* * *

_She'd also started to notice that her boss would get spirited away at the oddest of times._

_'Oh. He's out again.'_

_Opening the door to his office she set down her broom pulling on the yellow rubber gloves._

_She'd started to frequent his office much more often ever since he'd given her permission to start cleaning his office every time it got messy in her eyes._

**_. . ._ **

_"It's not that messy Assistant."_

_"Oh really?"_

_Raising an eyebrow she stared up at him hoping to elicit a nervous response out of him._

_She got nothing._

_"Yes."_

_Still cool as ice, he answered back not one bit unfazed._

_"Fine then, what's this?"_

_Lifting a moldy bag of food to his face she waited patiently for his answer the unsure look in his eyes saying she'd already won this debate._

_"Fine."_

_"Now was that so hard?"_

_"Don't push it Assitant."_

_"Michiru."_

_"Whatever."_

**_. . ._ **

_"Dr. Ogami?"_

_"He's not here!"_

_"Oh, thank you, Michiru."_

_"Your welcome!"_

_She also started to notice that Inspector Yuji would be the last one seen with her boss before he would "spirit away"._

_It's not like she didn't desperately want to follow them and figure out where the hell he was going._

_It most certainly wasn't like that at all._

_Minutes had passed before the door opened again._

_"The doctor's not here."_

_It was becoming a motto she thought the words already ready on her lips._

_"So now your kicking me out of my office."_

_"Not my fault buddy and who's off-ohhhh."_

_She could hear the smirk in his voice as he fired back._   
  
_"Do you remember me now?"_   
  
_"Hey! At least I cleaned your office."_   
  
_"That depends."_   
  
_A steady warm silence washed over them both before she broke it taking her gloves off to wipe the debris on her white coat._   
  
_"Hey, Shirou?"_   
  
_Taking his silence as an indication to continue she started to stare at the book she'd picked up randomly as she ran her mouth off trying to distract herself._   
  
_"Why don't you come over on Sundays anymore?"_   
  
_"I have other plans."_   
  
_The way he said it made it seem like he planned to shut this conversation in one go. But she wouldn't allow him to dodge her questions this time._   
  
_"And what are these "other plans"?"_   
  
_He stiffened at her biting tone before answering again._   
  
_"Not your business."_

_"Excuse me?"_

_"It's not your business as to what I do on my days off."_   
  
_"What are-What the hell happened to you?!"_

_Dropping the book on the ground now forgotten she rushed over pulling his dirtied doctor's coat gaining a closer look at his new wounds._

_There were what looked like knife slashes on his black shirt blood oozing from where the knife had touched his skin. The bruises on his knuckles hidden as he slipped them back into his pockets._

_"Why do you have blood on you?"_   
  
_Snatching his coat from her hands he started changing so nonchalantly it scared her._   
  
_"..."_

_His silence wasn't a good sign either and only served to anger her even further._

_"What happened?" grabbing onto his coat again the way her voice dropped as she hissed harshly at him showed just how enraged she was._

_"It's not your-"_

_"It defiantly is! You're my damn boss and if you don't tell me where the hell you sneak off to how-"_

_"And why is it your job to know what I do?"_   
  
_That shut her up faster than a slap to the face the cold and quiet way he said it accompanied with a full look in his eyes._   
  
_She'd grown breathless yelling and shouting at him while he continued to look put together like he's had this conversation before. The room felt like it spiked in temperature to match how she felt._   
  
_"Just get out."_   
  
_He could feel a headache forming after fighting with her._   
  
_She was just so damn persistent and when she started she'd get him as deeply entwined within the argument as herself._   
  
_"Leave."_   
  
_"What?"_   
  
_"I said leave."_   
  
_Biting her lip she wanted to yell drag this all out and get a valid answer out from him._   
  
_But she didn't._   
  
_The look he gave her said that if she didn't leave he'd do something drastic without any remorse._   
  
_"Of course Dr. Ogami."_   
  
_That was probably when they became so distant with one another._   
  


* * *

When the clinic officially became his new place of residence that's when it was made official.

He was doing something that wasn't exactly good, and she just needed to know.

It kept clawing at the deepest levels of her subconscious.

_'Just what the hell is he doing?'_

The view inside of the office had honestly stopped shocking her. Coming in to see him sleeping on the couch or hunched over the computer in his office with constantly slicked back hair and dark circles contrasting against his pale skin was becoming a routinely sight.

His office was an even sorrier sight for sore eyes, however.

Ever since she'd stopped cleaning the insides of his office he'd returned back to his old habits. His documents would be littered all over his desk from left to right and piles of papers would lay on the ground half-open folders surrounding his computer.

Slowly it started becoming a normal sight for her to just walk in and see him just like this.

Seeming him look so **spent** and **weary**.

A normal sight that she detested from the bottom of her heart.

But what could she do?

Absolutely nothing.

A reminder of what happened when she overstepped her boundaries passed through.

**_"And why is it your job to know what I do?"_ **

_'Nothing good came out when I was interested in his business the first time. Why should I expect anything different the second time? All it did was make him even worse.'_

Guilt held her down. Stopping her from talking out and speaking all of her thoughts unfiltered like she normally would.

_'I hate this feeling. I hate feeling useless.'_

Gripping the door handle she allowed herself to stew in her pit of self-pity before walking out.

"I'll be leaving Dr. Ogami."

She didn't know when she'd started referring to him so formerly.

_'We're growing further apart.'_

Solemnly accepting the gradual change she let herself out.

"Mhm."

Upon hearing the click of the door he nodded at her departing form.

He noticed it out of the corner of his eyes.

That look of restraint in her eyes like she was forcing herself to not do something. He'd see that look whenever he stared at her when she wasn't looking. Something he didn't have any plans to ever reveal to her.

_'It better not affect her work ethic, however.'_

With that last thought, he dived straight back into his research ignorant of the fact that this exactly was the reason she had such sad eyes the opposite of the vibrant eyes he was quite accustomed to.

* * *

"Dr.Ogami!"

Slamming the door open you could just tell that she had been running to get here. With the way she was panting so harshly her hair messy and scattered as if she'd just gotten out of bed what else could you assume?

"Assistant," regarding her cooly he allowed her inside the near-empty clinic.

"Why are you here so early?"

"Uhhh."

_'Great.'_

This was probably the stupidest plan she could come up with. But it was a plan and here she was blowing it trying to distract herself from the impending unknown.

"If you have nothing to say then I'll be leaving."

That woke her up as she moved to grab onto the ending of his coat once again trying to keep him in place.

"Dr.Ogami stop right there!"

Looking to regard her he focused on her once again staring straight into her eyes.

_'T-That's intense.'_

"Yes?"

"I'd-I'd like to ask you if..."

Great, she was starting to lose him once again her foot stuck in her mouth.

"Then it's probably that. Invite him to next week's get together..."

Nina's words once again flashed through her mind making her remember just why the heck she was here embarrassing herself even more than their first meeting.

"I'd like to know if you'll be attending the party at Nazuna's place!" her exclamation rang throughout the empty hallways the color in her eyes brighter than normal.

That shocked him out of his morning stupor more than his morning coffee ever could.

"Um! That's what I'd like to know," releasing his coat from her firm hold she bit the inside of her mouth trying to calm her nerves. With her full attention on him, she stood there expectant of his answer.

_'Not this again.'_

She was starting to wear him down with her persistence but that didn't mean he didn't have enough caffeine in him to kick just back.

"I've told you mul-"

"Now now Shirou you know that is no way to treat a lady."

They both looked over in the direction of the voice of the newcomer.

The obnoxious blonde hair was what caught Shirou's attention first before he saw sadly familiar teal eyes.

"Alan."

He growled out lowly the distaste in his words dripping.

_'Wait Alan?'_

Looking around between them both she didn't try to understand how they knew one another remembering just who exactly this was.

"Professor Alan?!"

"Oh? Hello Ms. Michiru."

The passive smile her former professor sported as he walked closer did much more than shock her but immediately somber her from her morning daze as she straightened up. Memories of how strict he was about presentation started to bubble up.

Today was going to be an eventful day she grimly thought.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I already finished this chapter but I was just to lazy to edit it. Also I finally wrote something that isn't 1k!  
> Also I I'm, strive off critique and suggestions.


	5. Damn him.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> "Why do you hate the professor so much?"
> 
> 'Working with him is already a pain.'
> 
> 'Am I really that childish for still holding onto this anger?'
> 
> Or in other words the professor and the doctor sure are a bunch of enigmas.

"Professor Alan?!"

"Oh? Hello Ms.Michiru."

With his signature blonde hair, dashing teal eyes that drew you in, and a simple gray colored suit you could most certainly say that this was defiantly my substitute professor Alan Sylvasta.

Who else had a tendency to literally _"dress for the occasion"_ sarcastically thinking a memory of him always coming to each of his lectures in a full course suit with not one hair out of place starts to resurface.

_"Oh my gosh, he's so hot!"_

_"I know right."_

_"Meh."_

The annoying high-pitched squeals from my female classmates floods through my ears as I take notice of the fact that part of him still hasn't changed.

"What are you doing here?"

The extreme displeasure Shirou was emitting in his presence snapped me out of my stupor as he walked closer.

Promptly ignoring Shirou's question his attention drifted back to me.

"Ah. Ms.Michiru I trust your internship here has been quite nice?"

Jumping back surprised it takes me by surprise to have his face so close fixing me with another one of his passive smiles.

"Ahhaha, yeah. It's been really good here."

_'Not really but you don't need to know that.'_

"Hey."

Our attention drifting back to Shirou he fixes Alan with another one of his _"looks"_. His eyes showing all of the disdain he holds towards my former teacher.

"I'm talking to you, Alan."

"Oh, I'm aware. But can't a teacher talk to their former student?"

Literally pushing himself into Shirou's line of sight he continues to talk probably knowingly walking on thin ice.

_'They look like they're going to kill one another.'_

"She's my assistant. If you need to say something to her then-"

"Anyway!"

Pushing Shirou aside promptly with a nervous smile I face my teacher blocking them both from seeing one another and possibly ripping one another's throats out.

_'Don't fight right now.'_

"Profesor Alan are you still a professor?"

Slowly tearing his eyes from Shirou his gaze drops down to me.

"Of course. I've found that I quite enjoyed teaching others so I stayed on as a full-time lecturer."

"Seriously?"

"Yeah."

"And how are your new students?"

"Hmm..."

"I'd describe them as a bunch of unruly heathens," the way he smiled gave you an image of a white prince on a horse but his words could be anything but like that.

"W-what?"

_'I've never heard those words out of his mouth before.'_

Shock must have been blatantly displayed onto my face with the loud cough Shirou made to hide his snickers.

"Right but are you sure that they are really like-"

"Yes. I'd say they are even worse than your class."

"What? You said our class was amazing!"

Now I was pissed, how dare he compare us to a class of wild, unruly children.

"I lied."

"So! That doesn't mean we weren't good-"

"Your class's former lecturer quit because you all drove him mad and I stayed on as his replacement."

Staring at one another he counted to press on his eyes silencing any retorts that appeared on my tongue.

"Oh."

_'Oh yeah, that did happen.'_

"I forgot that happened."

The discussion was finished right then and there Shirou probably laughing at the both of us muffled by his fake coughs.

Faking a very loud cough I draw attention away from my previous blunder.

"And how is Headmistress Rose?"

Looking thoughtful he leans on the wall away from the rest of us before answering.

"Ah, she's quite fine actually. Still as scary as ever though."

"What are you talking about she's just super cool Professor! If anything your the scary one with how chill your class was and then you'd throw random tests at-."

"What was that?"

He was sporting another one of his usual passive-aggressive smiles sending goosebumps throughout my body.

"Nothing!"

Now both Shirou and Profesor Alan were chuckling at my expense a blush spreading.

_'Stop laughing at my expense!'_

It was so unfair her I am trying to make them play nice with one another and they take it as an initiative to laugh at my shortcomings?

What a bunch of jerks.

_'Ah, that's right.'_

"Professor?"

"Yes?"

Drawing his smile back he finally regards me seriously.

"How do you know the doctor?"

The dark aura came back quickly replacing the prior tender lightheartedness from earlier as if it'd never been there.

_'Crap.'_

"How I know Doctor Ogami? Well, we went to the same college, we also worked at the same hospital before."

"Really? He actually worked somewhere else?"

"Yes, he did."

"If I think about it honestly we've known each other for a very long time."

After that statement, the dark mood continues to grow even darker Alan still smiling with Shirou letting out little threatening growls.

Well, I couldn't see Shirou's expression but assuming from the aura of hostility prickling my back it seemed he wasn't exactly happy with what he'd just revealed.

About to give up on saving this conversation a last-ditch plan starts to build up within me.

"Oh really. Well then do you have any embarrassing stories about him? You know, as an old friend?"

There's nothing but silence throughout the hallway before it's broken by a loud velvet-like laugh from Alan.

"Embarrassing stories? That's what you want to know Ms. Michiru?"

"Mhm-mhm."

Nodding frantically curiosity returns as I expectantly wait for him to answer.

"Well you see, when we were still classmates Ogami wou-"

" **Alan**."

The gruff way he practically growled his name interrupted our conversation.

"Yes?"

"We **had** an arrangement."

Standing between us both he basically corners Alan before glaring back at me.

"You can open up the clinic Assistant."

"Wh-"

"Get. A. Move. On."

With the slow deliberate way, he said that sentence along with the focus put on each word I could very much so interpret his real meaning.

_**'Go away.'** _

"Of course!"

Taking the very obvious hint to get lost I excuse myself from them both only catching the last fleeting remnants of a retort from Alan before arriving inside my office.

"What the heck are they doing out there?"

Trying to shake that question out of my head I start to boot up the laptop on the desk already pulling my coat out from the closet.

Even though I try that same question continues to haunt me throughout the day before Alan departs with a rushed _'Goodbye Ms.Michiru.'_ being pursued out the door by a very annoyed Shirou.

* * *

_'She's gone.'_

Releasing the tension in my shoulders I calm down no longer worried about her presence.

Heaving a tired sigh I direct another glare at the annoying blonde fool in front of me.

"What the hell are you doing here?"

Grinning impishly he leans closer.

"Can't I come to visit an old friend?"

_'And when were we still friends?'_

Waving that thought away my focus comes back to him.

"Cut to the chase Sylvasta."

"You know you were never any fun Ogami."

"Sylvasta."

Muttering his name seems to get the appropriate reaction out of him as he pulls back. Still with a smile but no longer with his usual air of fun.

_'Some things just never change.'_

"Fine fine. I came because you wanted those lab results," talking he pulls something out from his briefcase that I'd failed to notice during his introduction.

_'I'm becoming too lax these days.'_

With that sudden realization plans on how to mend my deterring senses start to form.

"You said that these select few were found by The Family in their territory?"

Nodding in preference of telling him he takes that as confirmation.

"You also said the only thing each of then had in common was that they both bought drugs from one courier no one else?"

"Yes."

Looking through the files in the folder he looks back at me.

"And what drug did they buy Shirou?"

_'And since when did we start to refer to one another on a first-name basis?'_

Pushing that thought away I answer him.

_'Your acting like a child.'_

"That's the thing I'm confused about. The drugs that I'm thinking could cause these effects don't appear to be in their system."

"The effects also seem similar enough but appear to be more amplified."

Nodding throughout everything he reads through the results making little notes whenever he hears something new or worthwhile.

"Well from what we could find in the lab your right about it not being an existing drug."

Closing the file he throws it towards me.

"Looks like you might have been right."

Noticing the raise of my eyebrow he clarifies his prior thoughts.

"We just might have an unknown drug circulating around."

With that announcement made official, the mood becomes tenser with the realization that we had an unknown drug circulating around with unknown effects and no idea where it was being manufactured. This city was already a wreck and this new change of events certainly wouldn't do much but finally, bring it down.

_'What a pain.'_

"We can't do much just standing around, so take this."

With a loud sigh, Alan picks himself off handing another folder to me.

"The first one is the test results. The other one is some information on the places the victims were found. Find out more about those areas and what exactly goes down there."

"Read it later."

"And why are you giving this to me?"

"Hmm," looking thoughtful he follows up with an answer.

"I trust you'll find some clue by a miraculous stroke of luck."

"Are you stupid?"

"No Shirou I am not."

"I'll find the mink and ask her what she knows."

Nodding as he speaks a fleeting memory of something similar passes by before it's banished to the depths of my mind.

"And since when were you and the mink so close? Or did you not find her as _"a con artist"_ and _"not to be trusted"_?"

Chuckling he titles his head interested.

_'Why do I still remember these things.'_

"I've had her help with many projects lately so I've had to be in her presence more than once."

With everything put together in his briefcase, he takes a thoughtful look before smirking at me.

"What?"

"Nothing."

"Doesn't look like nothing."

"Mhm. It's really nothing other than that you should treat your assistant better. She's a hard-working honest girl, perfect for you no?"

"Alan."

My voice is on the verge of warning not liking where this conversation is going.

"I'm just saying. It's very hard to find people like that these days."

"Alan."

"I just might-"

Grabbing him by his suit my eyes narrow not liking how he's won't back off my voice now low and threatening.

"Leave her alone Sylvasta."

Silence passes through the hallway before he chuckles smirking.

"I know I know."

Smacking my hand away he fixes his shirt a look in his eye like he knows something I don't know.

A look I don't like.

"Don't worry I'd never do anything to hinder a former student. It'd go against my oath as a teacher."

Placing his hand on my shoulder he leans in closer whispering something.

_'Be careful.'_

Drawing back he faces me one more time.

"Au Revoir Shirou."

With that, he's gone or he tries to make me believe he's gone but knowing him I find him not even two minutes later at her office door.

"Alan."

"I know I know I'm going."

"Bye Ms. Michiru."

"B-Bye?"

"Alan."

* * *

  
_'I wonder why Professor Alan didn't come by today?'_

By some unlucky twist of fate, her former teacher would always have a scheduled meeting with her boss. Meaning she'd have to always be on her best behavior discarding all her unprofessional mannerisms for the sake of not being given another one of his condescending smiles partnered with his sarcastic comments.

_'And here I thought I'd never return back to those days.'_

Shoving that thought away she focused back on her returning friend.

"Are you coming?"

"Yes, Nazuna I'm coming."

With her hair in a small ponytail, she walked slightly happier than she'd been all week.

Why wouldn't she?

Her best friend was coming back from a long world tour after all.

"You'd better, I haven't seen you or Nina in so long."

Giggling at her childishness she locked the door to her office waving goodbye to any passing co-workers.

_"Bye Michiru."_

_"Bye."_

_"Hey, Michiru wanna go drinking with us?"_

_"Na, I'm good."_

_"Okay tell us if you change your mind."_

Nodding she returned back to the conversation at hand apologizing for abandoning her friend once again.

"Haha, we were just talking with you yesterday."

"Mhm. As amazing as traveling the world is I want to come back home. "

"Aww, you miss us don't you," poking fun at her usually dismissive friend she waved goodbye to another co-worker.

"Obviously I miss Nina I mean without me there with her how can you properly function?"

Following up with her previous statement she could hear the smirk on the other side of the phone.

"Nevermind you tsundere."

"Ah ah ah but at least I don't lie and say I don't want to-"

"Okay! I get it!"

A harsh blush tinting her ears she waves her friend's advances away.

"Anyway when should we come to pick you up?"

"6 o'clock."

"Alright, then anything else you need to know before you forget?"

"Hey, this is-"

Spotting unmistakable white hair up on the rooftop she stopped in place outside her words caught in her throat.

"Michiru?"

"Michiru?"

"Michiru!"

Snapping back from her little mind trip she noticed her friend still yelling in her ear.

"Yeah sorry. Just um, I'll take to you later sorry Nazuna."

"Hey wait! Michi-"

Rushing through her words not paying attention to if they sounded right she ran after the familiar tall built silhouette of her boss.

_'Today's gonna be the day!'_

Determination alight in her eyes she continued to run up the stairs placing her phone away.

* * *

Sighing he cracked his neck stiff from being in the same position all day.

He must've looked like shit he thought bringing the cold can of beer to his lips.

Well, that was the least of his concerns he grumbled more annoyed about the lack of information he'd managed to pull up.

_'Having to ask for **his** help is already tiring enough.'_

Gripping the metal can at the slightest mention of his former college he groaned at just how riled up he could still get.

_'You'd think after all these years I would've exhausted myself of this anger.'_

_'Am I really that pathetic that I-'_

"Doctor Ogami!"

_'Great.'_

Reluctantly acknowledging his persistent assistant he settled back on the ledge overlooking the city sights.

"Doctor Ogami."

Breathing lightly she placed a hand on the door balancing herself to look up at him.

"Assistant."

"Yes?"

Biting the inside of his mouth he slightly blushed at just how flustered she looked.

_'Did she run all the way from the bottom to get here?'_

Her physical capabilities always seemed to impress him no matter the situation.

Coughing he looked back at her before looking away quickly.

"Your appearance."

"Huh?"

It took her a while to notice what he'd been trying to point out before she looked down.

"I'm so sorry!"

Straightening up she remembered her appearance hastily fixing her shirt while smoothing her hair down.

They stood like that for a while just standing the stars illuminating the dark sky before she broke it.

"Doctor?"

"Yes?"

Taking a huge gulp of air she continued aware she was treading on thin ice.

"Why don't you ever let Professor Alan in?"

His eyes narrowed annoyed at how the conversation had effortlessly changed to something else.

"His business was over."

"But you could have at least let him in!"

"He's your old friend for god's sake."

That struck a deep sated nerve within him. He wasn't friends with someone like that.

Not anymore at least.

"We're not friends."

How he could go from calming and neutral to icy and frigid was beyond her.

"Is that true?"

Gripping onto his arm she continued to press on.

"Because if it wasn't he wouldn't continue to visit you. Even if it was because you both had plans prior."

Staring into his eyes she asked again.

"Just why do you dislike the professor so much, Dr. Ogami?"

Why did that anger him?

Why did it make him irritated that she could talk so fondly with **him** and yet nowadays she could barely talk to him without the use of honorifics?

_'It doesn't matter.'_

Slapping her hand away he started to head back inside.

Ignoring her as usual.

In front, of the door, he couldn't stop himself from leaving her with a warning.

"Be careful around that professor of yours."

She didn't know why but that pissed her off she had started getting used to the way he would brush her off. But now she was unraveling, forget trying to understand and respect his wishes.

"Walking away without answering. That's so like you."

Clenching her fists she kept talking her voice lowering as she approached him.

"It's just like you to never tell me anything. It's like you to go around warning me of something and then never say why."

"Why?! Why won't you talk to me."

Her question rang out the empty roof showing just how alone the two of them were.

"Assistant it is-"

"No shut up!"

"When I want you to talk you say nothing but when I talk you always have to interrupt me. It's just like when I asked you to come to the party. You found a way out and never answered, it's been days since and where's your answer?"

Jabbing her finger into his chest she kept backing him up until his back hit the door.

"Why won't you talk? Why do you hate the professor? Why can't you just te-"

"It's not something you'd understand!"

That stopped her rant, this was the first time he'd yelled. The first time that he didn't look so perfectly put together.

"You haven't gone through what I have to say anything about me."

"You're not me."

Somehow they'd switched positions he was cornering her on the door the both of them panting.

It was the first time she'd seen him yell so much she thought. On another day she'd probably be happy at any emotion she could pull out of him but not today. Today she'd yell as much as she wanted because damn him. Damn him for making her feel so helpless for making the fact that she just wanted to help him feel so hard and bad.

Damn him for making her try so hard with nothing to show for it.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Am I repeating something? I probably am so time to keep writing.


	6. "It's gonna be a good day."

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Friends really are the best gift you could get. Or...  
> I give you steam and angst because I like steam and hate angst.

Eye-catching bright pink hair was what you would notice first before taking in the woman behind the hair. Clothed in a baggy hoodie combined with her signature black leggings and sneakers you could tell she was fairly well off. 

_'I knew I shouldn't have let those two come pick me up.'_

Leaning onto her luggage she started to furiously tap away like she'd been possessed by the phone mentally kicking herself for trusting they'd be on time. 

_'When are those two getting here?'_

Nazuna Hiwatashi was not a patient woman and that didn't mean her two closest friends were exempt from her anger as she spotted Michiru approaching.

"Nazuna we're here!"

Looking up she waved slightly before losing interest.

"Next time be on time," muttering she hid the light blush that lit her cheeks lips curling into a secretive smile.

_'Stupid.'_

The black-haired woman who called out looked so energetic a baseball bat in hand and a cap nestled on her head as she ran closer to her beloved friend. The tan-skinned woman behind her was barely catching up her hair following through with all the frantic movements she made trying to keep up with Michiru's pace white sunglasses snuggled in her hair.

"Wait! Michiru slow down!"

Her pleas were lost to the woman's frantic gushes of excitement jumping up to hug her friend surprising the accomplished idol out of a stupor.

"Get off Michiru."

Her voice was coated deep in that familiar annoyance and irritation that Michiru was so used to.

_'She didn't change.'_

Relief flooded her as she hugged tighter ignoring Nazuna's angry protests.

_'I don't need anyone else changing.'_

"Michiru seriously get off!"

"No way!"

Locking her legs around her hips defiantly she nuzzled into her friend's neck the familiar smell of roses clouding her nose.

"Your funeral then," sighing she continued tapping away noticing Nina approaching.

"Don't be like that. You know you still love me," sulking she waved happily at her other friend.

"Nina you finally caught up."

"Michiru please don't, huff run, huff like that next time," it was hard to get a single sentence out Nina's lungs trying hard to let air in.

"But why?"

It wasn't like she was running faster than normal this was her normal speed after all.

"Because I'm not as athletic as you silly."

"But Nina-Ow!"

"Owwie Nina let goooo." her voice picked up in pain whining at the sharp feeling.

It wouldn't be an understatement to say Nina wasn't at least miffed the former swimmer pulling harder on the basketball fanatic's cheek.

"Do I have your word that you'll wait up next time?"

"Yesss."

Smiling she released Michiru's captive cheek the twinge of pain lingering as the woman cradled her abused cheek.

"Isn't that the understatement of the year. No-one can match her freakish stamina or strength."

"Truly I wonder if she's human at times," Nina sighed running a calming hand through Michiru's hair.

"Who doesn't?"

"Ninaaaa Nazuna's bullying me again," their scrutinizing stares left her feeling uncomfortable even if they didn't exactly mean to. Well, Nina at least Nazuna was a different case.

"Oh right! How are you Nazuna?"

"Couldn't be better. But can you get her down? My back's killing me over here."

"I'm not heavy!"

"No Michiru your not but you should get down."

Nodding solemnly the relived sigh Nazuna gave out was not hidden from her ears.

Nina really was the sensible one out of the bunch keeping Michiru and Nazuna's childishness in check. Even if she herself was also just as bad. 

Maybe that's why they all clicked so well?

A moody and constantly snarky pop idol, a former pro swimmer turned influencer with a sophisticated air around her, and a normal doctor's assistant with a love for a basketball.

"Well come on let's go Nazuna."

"Hey! Aren't you forgetting something?"

"What?"

"The luggage."

Ah, that's right she'd lost in a drinking game and had in turn become this psychopath's pack mule. Just what was her life coming to?

"Fineee."

Groaning she grabbed the feminine colored duffel bags slinging them over her shoulder while balancing the rest on her head.

'Wait. Where did they go?'

Noticing her friends nowhere in sight panic started to surge.

_"You know Michiru."_

_"Yeah?"_

_" Your sense of direction...is pretty bad."_

_"W-what?" she was slightly blubbering now the wine finally making it's effect on her known._

_"Nazuna's not wrong on this Michiru," Nina was there too in a white floral dress seated across from them both being forcefully restrained from taking a sip out of the alcohol._

_For the sole reason that she could become very wild when drunk._

_"What are you two t-talking about. My s-sense of direction is amazing."_

_Her two friends exchanged a blatant look saying 'she can't be serious' before shifting their focus back to her._

_"Michiru whenever it was your turn to lead us on a field trip we'd always end up at the wrong places even though you had the map."_

_"And there was the other time when you somehow lost us at the movie theater-," Nina couldn't help but chime in in sync with her main tormentor._

_"You kept calling our phones yelling something about being out back."_

_She remembered clearly now, after finding the bathroom she managed to find herself outside with the dumpster. She'd probably blown up their phones with how many times she called them for directions._

_"Basically, your sense of direction is atrocious."_

_They'd even gone far as to use big words to describe the fact she had the tendency to get lost in new places even after receiving proper directions._

_But it's not like she could say anything already fading into sleep to tired to continue the conversation._

"Why'd you leave me like that!"

It'd taken a while but she'd caught up with them finding her supposed friends inside a cafe talking amidst themselves.

"Because you were having gloomy thoughts again."

Nazuna never really did sugarcoat anything the hint of irritation in her voice very evident.

"But still you both know my sense of direction is bad."

"Oh, **now** she admits it."

Choosing to ignore the stinging comment she focused her attention on the only sensible one here.

"Was I really having gloomy thoughts?"

Sensing the tension between them both the mediator heaved a sigh.

"Yes, you were."

_'Oh.'_

"Sorry then. Work's just been busy."

She wasn't lying to talk herself out of this conversation. Work had been busy and staying up to date with whatever her co-workers were working on was hard-enough. But with the latest developments in her relationship with Shirou work had gradually become tenser and more awkward.

"It's not me who needs an apology Michiru. Nazuna wanted to spend today with you after all."

"Yeah right, Nina. Don't go around putting words in my mouth."

Even if she looked annoyed tapping away once again on her phone they both could tell that she was worried and just overly jealous of whatever had stolen her best friend's focus from her once again.

Laughing she apologized to the idol nuzzling into her side gratefully shooting Nina a thankful look.

Today would be a good day. She was with her beloved friends and today would be about them first foremost.

When they'd go their separate ways and she returned home then she could allow her hectic thoughts to take a hold of her.

For now, she could laugh and forget what happened that day.

. . .

"Come on Michiru tell us about work."

"Nothing interesting happened Nazuna."

"Are you sure about that?"

"Really."

"Whattt are you talkiiing abbouut Michiruuu?"

Nina was leaning into Michiru purring into her side. Her shoulder-length hair messy tanned cheeks flushed from the amount of alcohol she'd taken in.

That was what Nina was like when completely drunk, the normally airheaded, sophisticated woman was a blubbering, flustered mess after just a few rounds of drinks and by the end of the night, she'd be fast asleep on the way home with Nazuna in tow.

"Yesterday you told me that he did som-e-thing?"

"I think your mistaken Nina," brushing her hand into Nina's well-cared hair all Michiru could do was hope she'd forget everything that she'd told her before.

"R-really? _-hic-_ but you said that heee.... What did you say he did again?"

"I think that's enough drinks for you, Nina."

"W-wwhat? Noooo."

She was laughing taking away the glass from her but if you probably squinted you could see the panic radiating through her. From the nervous twinge in her eyebrows to the way she silently wished for the drunken heiress to drop it.

"Are you sure you can't remember Nina," the piqued curiosity of Nazuna was never a good thing Michiru was starting to learn. 

"Hey she's-"

".... N, nope. I can't remember."

She'd leaned over to Nazuna's side now her plate of food forgotten.

"Are you sure? I'll give you a sip if you can remember."

The offer of more to drink was defiantly tempting to the alcoholic lover but before she could even reply the woman in interrogation interrupted her voice very stern.

"Nazuna!"

Time ticked by slowly for the trio of friends before Nazuna broke it chuckling. From the anger burning in Michiru's eyes, you could tell that talking about it any longer would provoke a terrible reaction from the basketball fan. 

"I was just joking you dumbie," flicking her finger Nazuna smirked at the yelp she gave cutely pouting.

"Tsundere."

"Shut up Michiru."

"Nazuu give me a sip Michi won't hand over my drinks."

"Because you've already drunk enough Nina."

"No, I haven't."

"Nazuuu."

"Fine."

Sliding the barely touched cup towards the drunken girl she focused her attention back on her food taking some from the distracted Nina.

"Nazuna why'd you give it to her?!"

"She's a grown-up woman. Plus it's her health in jeopardy. Not mine."

"Aww, t-thanks Nazu."

"Yeah yeah."

Waving the overly affectionate girl away annoyed she ignored how she kept hugging her Michiru fuming across from them at just how uncaring the idol could be.

"How's your boss by the way?"

"Fine."

Well, that was the quick end of her slight jab at the _'forbidden topic'_.

But it disturbed her greatly the memory coming back to her as she hustled a drowsy Nina into a taxi. It was most certainly strange that Michiru didn't blush or start to ramble on when she mentioned Shirou anymore. Instead, she had a look of anger and bittersweet sadness to her.

The pop idol blanched in disgust mentally her meal not settling well. 

_'Acting like an adult isn't a good look for you Michiru.'_

* * *

_'This is the last time I let Nina get drunk with Nazuna around.'_ , she swore wrapping her sweater tighter around herself trying and failing miserably to open the door. The keys missing the slot by a millimeter.

"Come on now," she whispers voice raising slightly in annoyance. 

Another miss.

_'It's too cold for this today.'_

"Open up," harshly whispering she kept jamming the key into the slot.

Growing rapidly irritated at the number of growing failures the lack of noise to help distract her from her garbled thoughts only served to further frustrate her.

"Would you just open up already?!"

When had she started yelling, she thought she needed to be quiet or she'd wake up the neighbors. But this silly key wouldn't open up.

Strangely enough, the key reminded her of a certain albino man she was quite accustomed to. Reluctant to open up no matter how many times you tried.

_"It's not your business."_

"Hah," another memory of his cold, devoid voice refusing her appeared leaving a foul taste in her already dampening mood. 

_'Not my business huh?'_

"So what if it isn't!", before she knew it her foot had made contact with the metal door.

"Ow!"

Searing hot pain was all she felt spreading from the tips of her toes to the whole of her foot back sliding down the door till she hit the floor ignoring the repetitive sting.

It was freezing cold she noticed sitting on the ground so many thoughts jumbled inside her head that she barely noticed the warm feeling of some tears running down.

_'Do I even know the guy anymore?'_

This was starting to become a frequent question she noticed.

_'Does he always handle things by himself, or did I just never notice.'_

Sighing her eyes made contact with the glowing moon.

_"I wonder how he's doing?"_

* * *

_"You haven't gone through what I have to say anything about me."_

_"You're not me."_

_When had he gotten a hold on her shoulders she thought surprised the silence from his outburst stretching between them both._

_"Your not me," she whispered slowly and uncertain taken aback._

_'slap'_

_"Of course I'm not you!"_

_The sharp sound of her hand making contact with his cheek rang throughout the rooftop the two of them the only ones who could hear it._

_"I haven't gone through any of the things you have to just barge into your problems."_

_Gritting her teeth she glared up at him eyes narrowed in irritation forcing him to reluctantly take notice of the determined look on her face. Finding how she proudly stood on her tippy toes endearing of all things._

_"But so what?!"_

_She was a fool he thought a fool and an idiot._

_"Do I need a reason to want to help you. Is it bad to want to help a friend?!"_

_"Most people would leave a problem that isn't theirs alone," he growled feeling the sting from her harsh slap._

_'Her physical prowess really is insane.'_

_"Well, I'm not like most people!"_

_Placing her hands on his shoulders gripping tightly onto his coat she harshly brought him down even closer to her level taking in his current state once again. He'd started to grow slight stubble and the wrinkles near his eyes looked more pronounced showing just how old he was compared to her._

_How had she let this go this far?_

_She thought annoyed with her previous self's cowardice._

_'Well, not anymore.'_

_"I just want to know if a friend is okay."_

_Well, that was surprising to hear he thought the tips of his ears dusting a light tint of red._

_"Assistant-", he coughed flustered at the excitement in her eyes._

_"No! Call me by my name!"_

_"Assistant-", he was growing annoyed with her relentless persistence now his hands-on straying too her hips._

_Before he could finish she'd placed her lips on his a harsh blush dusting her face._

_They stayed like that for a few minutes awkward tension flowing through their bodies._

_Detaching her lips from his cheeks colored with red she nervously fiddled her thumbs. Face hidden all Michiru could do was mumble random excuses afraid of the man's reaction._

_'This is so stupid. Why the hell did I kiss him? What if he-'_

_She didn't get long to think about the intentions behind her actions the words he said next leaving her completely dumbfounded._

_"Kiss me again," woken from his thoughts he gasped looking completely serious._

_"Huh?!"_

_"W-What are you talking about?1!"_

_"I said kiss me again," he was scaring her now and in a completely different context sending delightful shivers through her body._

_'I-Is he okay? Is he drunk or something?'_

_Shirou didn't allow her to think any longer his lips coming down devouring her tiny gasp of shock._

_'What's he doing. W-what do I do?'_

_A myriad of thoughts kept her from responding hands settled on his shoulders, eyes wide, and body tense in anticipation._

_"Relax," he whispered sharply biting the juncture connecting her neck and shoulder mumbling hotly against her._

_"S-Shut up," it was meant to sound more firm but the tingles from his previous kiss had her weak._

_'S-stupid cocky idiot.'_

_"Mmm. Then make me," he hums leaving a trail of goosebumps all over her a slight mischievous glint in his eyes._

_In retaliation, she pressed her lips back against his eyes twinkling fingers entangled into his greasy hair._

_His lips were honestly surprisingly soft she thought a startling contrast to the fiery way he descended upon her pushing her back against the door._

_His hand tracing her side drawing soft sighs from her lips with every nibble on her neck._

_"W-wait t-eep!"_

_Her grip on his hair tightened immediately whining pathetically when he found a sensitive spot whimpering at the small aftershocks._

_"Be quiet," the hushed way he whispered into her ear pressing his body against her even more his hot breath warming her face had her whine even more._

_"Or do you want someone to hear us?"_

_"N-no," it was hard to seem convincing with how messy and flustered she appeared his lips proving to be quite distracting._

_"Then move."_

_"W-What?"_

_"Move," he growled fingers lifting her skirt slightly nipping at her lips drawing heated gasps._

_"No w-wait this is wrong I ...," it was hard to form a coherent thought or response moaning for him her hips grinding against him involuntarily seeking pleasure._

_"That's right. Move," the dark way he whispered his command had her even weaker he noticed tilting her chin to look him in the eyes enjoying the look of fear and want reflecting in her eyes._

_She was so similar to a baby lamb blissfully ignorant and unaware of the danger they were in even with the big bad wolf right outside._

_She was just too naive to leave him alone._

_He chuckled capturing her lips once again a hand wrapped around her neck._

_Taking dark delight in the impatient way she keeled for more kissing all over the underside of his chin inhaling the sharp peppery scent he walked around with feeling the tense muscles underneath his coat._

_"S-s-so good," whimpering she could almost laugh bitterly at how she'd been reduced to this._

_Reduced to crying against his touch gripped onto his shoulders her mind foggy with thoughts of heat nails leaving crescent-shaped indents a fire blooming in her stomach from his groans enjoying every peek of skin her eyes could see._

_The sharp sudden nip along her ear jolted her back from the intoxicated daze she was under his tongue lightly soothing it over._

_"God, your - so delicious," he groaned lifting her suddenly from the ground spreading her body against the door._

_"Shirou," moaning softly she gasps out for whatever this is purring against him happily running her fingers through his hair pulling him closer into her bosom._

_This strange feeling of heat that he'd introduced her to._

_'I want more of it. I want to feel it completely.'_

_"Feels so good," grasping onto him her legs somehow end up wrapped around his waist skirt hiking up the throb of heat between her legs no longer easy to ignore._

_Somehow they end up like this, Shirou's bigger body overpowering hers his fingers sliding down to places never once explored. Tracing over her mound barely controlling the beast inside him that wants to completely ravish and devour her outside on this cold day._

_"M-Movee!," she's whining now pushing her hips down onto his crotch enjoying how he hisses at the contact._

_She was to far gone now completely lost in the throes of pleasure as cliche as that sounded._

_"Sh, Shirouuu please, put it in."_

_That's when it all came crashing down. The realization he had his assistant pushed up against a door crying for him to do things unspeakable between a superior and their junior that should never happen. Her hair scattered and body flushing in heat from head to toe eyes wet her shirt button's ripped apart._

_Panting and mewling._

_'Disgusting.'_

_Moving away like he'd been burned he retreated the hand that had been trailing up her leg._

_'What have you done?'_

_"S-Shirou?"_

_"Shirou?", she whispered again concerned._

_'Did I do something wrong?'_

_He looked at her flinching against the way she reached._

_"Go home," fixing his clothes he started to back away mind split between going back and finishing this or just walking away._

_'What?'_

_So they were doing this again she thought latching onto his arm once again. This thing where they were hot and cold with one another never on the same wavelength for too long._

_"Well, what if I don't want to!"_

_"Go home," trying desperately hard to shake her off Shirou continues walking the guilt and shame crushing him with each step._

_"And that's another thing you do!"_

_"You act nice and somewhat decent and then you go and turn on me like a jerk!"_

_He stopped partly before looking back at her his eyes narrowed teeth bared ready to attack._

_The only thing he was good at._

_"Assi-," the growl in his words was unmistakable but she couldn't care less full-on shouting._

_"Persistently avoiding the conversation and yelling at me to leave."_

_"It's so typical of you!"_

_She'd grabbed him again by the shoulders her bright eyes starting to dim considerably. Her eyelashes wet not from pleasure but from rage and sadness._

_'I-I let him touch me like that. A-A-And he does something like this.'_

_'Just what are you so afraid of?'_

_God, she sounded pathetic._

_"Ms. Kagemori...," he wasn't kidding now voice dark and deep sounding out every syllable of her name forcefully removing her hands._

_"It'd do you good to not act so fondly with me."_

_"Why?"_

_"As your superior, I should-"_

_"Why do you keep saying that?!"_

_"Your not just my superior. Your, your, .... your my friend," she'd exhausted herself burning in shame at the rapid tears running down her face._

_".... Friend?"_

_"Y-yes?", the way he hadn't reacted to those words scared her more than anything her hold on his shoulders growing loose._

_"Ms.Kagemori."_

_The professional way he addressed her had devilishly delightful shivers going down her spine against her will._

_"Yes, Dr.Ogami?"_

_"We were never friends."_

_'W-what?'_

_It hurt, it hurt that he could look at her like she was repulsing and say such soul-crushing words. It hurt seeing so much disgust and contempt mirrored in his eyes at just the simple sight of her._

_"O-of course."_

_Fixing her shirt Michiru bit her tongue trying to control the dam of tears that wanted to gush forth. Controlling the wave of emotion that he'd managed to awake._

_"Doctor. Ogami!"_

_He didn't respond allowing his eyes to do the talking._

_'What?', they asked as he peered at her over his shoulder back offering a curtain over her crumbling modesty._

_'Tall bastard.'_

_"You look really bad Doctor. Ogami."_

_That bitting tone and the formal way she referred to him always annoyed him he thought eyebrows drawing in frustration._

_"Really now?"_

_Staring back he desperately hoped the dark expression etched on his face would drive her away faster._

_"Why would I lie to a superior?", she smiled sweetly similar to a child who'd done something wrong and tried to cover it up._

_"Just take better care of yourself, Doctor."_

_Whispering she left the roof trying desperately hard to stay mad at him._

_Any emotion was better than feeling sad for that bastard._

* * *

_"We were never friends."_

He'd told her that with a strong look of disgust in his eyes. Was it targeted at her for reacting so wantonly towards his actions? Crying and thrashing for his touch begging for him to force her against the door and take her for the world to see? 

Even now those memories brought a strange blush onto her face feeling her body ache in strange ways.

_'Then what were we Shirou?'_

If they were never friends then had she been deluding herself all these years? Ignoring how he truly felt towards her in favor of keeping up the fantasy she'd created around them.

Maybe she was wrong. Hopelessly wrong about the person Shirou Ogami was and everything he was to her. 

And it made her feel absolutely pathetic.

Maybe she'd been a bother to him from the start.

With these sorts of self-deprecating thoughts stewing inside it could force one to recognize that she wasn't as childish or nearly as naive as she presented herself.

"Because you were having gloomy thoughts again."

Nazuna's words came back echoing inside like a slap to the face. Wiping her dried tears away she looked off the railing watching the moving figures underneath taking in the warm air buzzing up from below.

 _'It's pretty out tonight.'_ she noticed a slight smile lighting up the mood. 

The bright colors from the lights and signs brightening the sky the hushed murmurs of others and loud noises from the vehicles combined all made the dark mood circling her lift, somewhat.

_'It's gonna be a good day.'_

Choosing to leave all these thoughts for another day she grabbed the pesky key forgotten I the ground and went back out into the streets not ready to retire to bed.

"It's gonna be a good day."

She'd promised herself not to cry for a guy like that and she meant it.

* * *

"Shit."

Surprised and slightly aggravated bright brown eyes stared down at heavily exhausted nauseous dull blue eyes.

Today was turning out to be full of random coincidences they both thought the past events leading up to this rather rushed encounter seeming rather ridiculous in hindsight.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Haha... I'M SO SORRY I NEVER UPDATED THIS CHAPTER. I WAS LAZY AND SCHOOL STARTED AND AHHHHHHH!
> 
> But anyway I'll try to get back on the groove and actually get back to updating.


	7. Nazuuu

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> It's basically what the title says. A Nazu centric chapter before I start working on the next two that should tie this part over.

Here she was, the rising idol of the year Nazuna Hiwatash escorting her ridiculously drunk friend home. 

* * *

_Once again._

* * *

"Nazuuuu?"

Being brought out her thoughts Nazuna noticed Nina twirling around the garden flowers.

_"Nazuuu~"_

"Oh~-oops!", before she knew it her foot had hit a rock nearly tripping over her own two feet before Nazuna quickly extended a hand out to catch the whimsical idiot.

"Nina be more careful!"

Panting harshly worried thoughts ran through the idol's mind hoping the other hadn't sustained any serious injuries.

Giggling happily at the way Nazuna's hand tightened on hers she decided to take the irritated expression Nazuna gave her far too lightly than was probably smart.

"Jesus," taking Nina by the arm she couldn't help but scold the childish woman furiously taking breaths to steady herself.

"Why?", the way the drunk woman acted like a child only helped to piss the caretaker off even more before realizing just how pointless it was to stay angry at the latter.

"Because Michiru would be on my case if anything happened to you," muttering a blush coated her cheeks embarrassed by the fact she'd shown such weakness.

_'Besides, what would I do if something happened to you too?'_

" _Really?_ ", she was smiling a bit brighter now trying to lead Nazuna further away from the house coming closer into sight.

"Nina, you're going home understand?"

" _Awww~_ It was worth a try though," whining she resigned to her fate allowing Nazuna to drag them closer to the white pristine mansion.

"Nazuuuu what happened to Michi?"

"Nothing Nina."

Choosing to ignore any more of her drunken babble she continued walking towards the sparkling white mansion gagging at just how brightly gaudy it was.

"Nazuuu what happened to Michi?"

Groaning she continued lugging the heavily drunken woman through the gate.

"Open up I have your young mistress!"

As the guards scrambled to open the gates some offered to take their mistress off her hands before taking her death glare as an obvious answer for _'no'_.

"Nazu tell meeeeee-"

_"Nazuuu~"_

_"Nazuuuuuuuuu~"_

_"Nazuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu~"_

"Ms. Nazuna?! Is the young mistress okay d-did anything ha-"

Relief shot through her thanking the women for interrupting them.

"Move," giving an annoyed but curt nod to the maids crowding around them she continued towards the beloved lady's room.

"Ms. Nazuna let us carry her."

Pushing them out of the way she slammed the door open laying the mumbling Nina on the very messy bed.

_"Nazuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu~"_

"No Nina," pulling a blanket over the pouty woman she could help but tsk seating herself on the comfy bed.

"Please _Nazuuu~_ "

"She's fine Nina," sighing in defeat she decided to finally humor Nina to tired from heaving her all the way home.

" _mmm_ -That's good, she looked - _hic_ \- so sa _d~"_

"Yeah, she did," losing herself to her thoughts she couldn't help but frown somewhat even more.

"Nazuuuu~ Are you and Michi dating?"

Bopping a finger on her nose she couldn't help but resign from the quirkiness that made Nina. No longer flustered at her baseless ramblings.

"No, we're not you aqua haired fool."

"But your a better option than that asshole Shirou," snuggling into her arm Nazuna hit her over the head strictly.

_"Owieee~"_

"Don't go around cursing so brashly. Do you want Michiru to know?"

_"Nooo~"_

_'A better option huh?'_

_"heh"_

"Stupid. I'm just as bad as that guy."

" _No your not ~_ ," sniffling she patted the very depressing Nazuna on the head. Whispering murmurings as she started to doze off.

"Are you sure about that?" 

Expecting an answer she couldn't help but chuckle seeing the young miss dozing off into a peaceful slumber.

"Idiot."

_'I've done much worse to her than that guy could ever hope to.'_

* * *

_"You know, sometimes I wonder if you can see what I see?"_

_She was curious, her eyes reflected that fact properly trying to see what Nazuna meant._

_"What do you mean?"_

_"The stars. They shine so brightly."_

_"You lost me again ."_

_It was probably nothing new that Michiru couldn't understand Nazuna's nonsensical rhymes already resigning to remaining clueless once again._

_"Geez, Michiru."_

_"Sorrwee."_

_Pushing herself from their spot on the hill she turned to smile back at her confused friend the moon and stars illuminating her back with their glow._

_"The stars and the moon, they light up the sky. Unattainable but something that makes you want to touch," whispering her voice started to rise in tandem._

_"And you know what?! That's gonna be me one day! One day it'll be me upstage shining for the world to see!"_

_Her heart could only beat stopped by the spectacle a vision of Michiru's fellow highschooler older and onstage. A fatigued but heartfelt smile spreading over her lips sweating while breathing harshly after the performance she'd probably given._

_'She's shouting again.', Michiru mused relaxing under the wave of relief that Nazuna brought._

_Reaching out for Nazuna's hands she smiled encouragingly squeezing them tighter._

_'But I can't wait. I can't wait to see that happen.'_

_"Yeah! And when your shining onstage I'll have the loudest cheer out of everyone else!", she'd been swept up once again in the way Nazuna set the scene twirling around in circles accompanied by the orange-haired girl getting both flowers and grass all over the both of them._

_"You promise?", sticking a pinkie out her eyes burned with passion._

_"You promise that when we both reach our dreams we have to make sure to come to one another's shows and matches and cheer each other the loudest."_

_"Can you do that?"_

_"Of course!", needing no further push she'd laced her pinkie with the other both smiling big and content giddy from the excitement._

_"Then it's a promise."_

* * *

Shooting up from the bed covered in sweat she could only help but groan noticing she'd bunkered down in Nina's room once again.

_"Then it's a promise."_

The memory flashed back again as she looked to the sky the moon reflecting her tired state.

_'A promise I couldn't even keep.'_

Those regrets were still there and the guilt that continued to weigh her down loved to be ever so present.

Noticing Nina shift around in her bed making random noises a sort of melancholy smile found its way onto her lips deciding to avoid confronting those thoughts. 

For tonight at least.

Because that was what she was good for, running away.

_But she didn't mind being a coward if it meant that she'd have these two idiots around to help chip away at her shame and guilt._

_Maybe one day she wouldn't constantly feel like this._

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Well, this chapter didn't focus on any of the main characters. I'm sorry I can't writeeee. I've never actually written a story that's gotten this far so this is a learning experience. But I tried writing slower this time with a bit more thought, fewer words to read but it feels like it has a purpose.


	8. Routine

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The doctor is a tired creature who struggles on not breaking down 24/7. These are his ongoing tandem of thoughts spread through a few chapters.

_It's become a routine._

A tiring, monotonous routine deeply ingrained into his mind; wake up, drink at least 5 cups of coffee and try not to vomit **that** out, officially open up the clinic for another day of work, and stay behind to compile more research for that blonde fool, Alan, before turning in. Even that was a nightmare to do. Desperately trying to sleep on the uncomfortable hard coach tossing and turning while struggling to sleep.

The days had slowly started to blur together with each passing night the actions and sequences of each becoming forgetful. 

_'When was the last time I got a sufficient amount of sleep?'_

A wry smile grew on the tired face that reflected on the glass staring at the disorderly image of water droplets dripping off his albino strands.

Unkept white hair, heavy eyebags, and dull eyes that contrast against pale skin. It all made for the perfect haggard look he thought smugly a tired chuckle leaving his lips. 

_'I wonder what_ **_he_ ** _would say about this?'_

* * *

"Jesus kid get some sleep you look like shit," the head of the department grimaced disgusted at how someone so young could look so rotten. The others looked over cringing at how he paled in comparison to others. Most people at this age would look more youthful equipped with bright eyes bursting with naive innocence before realizing the reality before them. But these eyes were already full of dread like they knew the truth behind every word and action others made.

"I don't need any sleep, Sir." 

Responding dryly a fatigued but confident air surrounded him taking a seat at the desk. But it was clear those were actual lies with the obvious slight sway in each step he made moving closer towards the chair.

_'Wonder who the new junior is?'_

Sitting in the chair book open he couldn't resist taking a peek at the commotion upfront.

The kid looked really tired, that was true. But then again, why did that call for his concern? The kid obviously didn't want to take a break so if he happened to drop dead why should that poise any sort of concern towards him?

"Suit yourself junior. But no falling sleep during work!",

Tiredly replying with a "Yes sir," his focus was taken over by the reports settled on the desk calling him over.

**. . . .**

It felt similar to being slapped with a cold rag as he jumped up away from the overly cluttered desk. Thoughts left in tatters all he could do was hope that **they** hadn't been near to witness this very obvious blunder. Being ridiculed by people like that so early in the morning wasn't exactly a set priority on his list.

Straightening up to retain some semblance of pride he couldn't help but sigh in relief seeing that no one had been there to notice anything.

Well, except the more quiet senior who sat in the back of everything that ever happened.

_'It's a good thing he doesn't talk much.'_

Continuing on like nothing had happened those blissful thoughts of relief were quickly dashed by the next words said in that quiet room.

"I know you were asleep."

_'Shit.'_

_'How should I get out of this one?'_

Sparing a look at the obviously panicking junior all he could do was sigh wondering how head office had stuck someone like this **_here_** of all places.

"It's fine."

"Excuse me?"

Genuine curiosity coated those words.

_'Well, this is a first.'_

"Why are you so surprised?"

_'What an unusual kid. Most would be happy with just that.'_

"Well sir, most senior's would be annoyed and start chewing their juniors out."

_'Punctual and to the point. Gee ~'_

If Shirou noticed the obvious grimace the man gave he obviously didn't state it in his already growing lengthy report.

"Look!", slamming the journal on the desk to face Shirou he continued on tired of all this nonsense.

"As long as it doesn't affect your work then it's fine if you take a break," sighing face muscles contorted in annoyance they started to relax trying desperately to understand why he was so difficult.

_'Because you obviously need one.'_

Ever since the young man had been dropped off in this department he'd set off to work the following day trying to prove himself capable. While the others had used that as an excuse to dump all of their work onto his shoulders all he could feel was a sense of pity. With the large amounts of work, the junior had done this week he wasn't even remotely surprised at the way he kept collapsing asleep at the most random intervals of the day.

" _Besides, you've certainly earned it_ ," softly whispering he looked away focusing intently on the book trying to hide a very obvious awkward blush. This is exactly why he shouldn't have helped this kid berating himself for being so involved.

Well, this was new. While the others were happy with using his obvious earnestness for their own benefit this one edged on for him to take a break and slow down. What a strange one.

"Sir, your book is upside down," straight-laced and serious to a terrible fault that was all the junior was.

Well, there was no point in staring dumbfounded, waking himself from the short daze he'd been trapped in. There was work to be done after taking that short but sufficient amount of sleep.

Noticing just how accurate the emotionless boy was the man fumbled the book like a bumbling fool.

"I know that!"

"Of course you do sir," opening a binder he couldn't help the small crack of a smile that left chuckling at the amusing senior's ways.

"Stop laughing kid!"

"I'm not laughing," who would expect a person who functioned through life with such a straight face to be laughing at something petty. Not him at least.

"Sir."

"Yes you are!", there was no way a senior like him would let something like this go continuing on this worthless argument.

_'_ _He was an interesting one.'_

_Fondly thinking he continued working enjoying this strange but warming noise._

* * *

If that person was here right now they'd probably point out just how badly he looked. Fussing over how he never got enough rest when it was obvious how much he needed some.

_"The thing about guys like you is that you never rest when you need to kid."_

_"You're of no use to anyone if you're struggling to stay awake and upright 24/7."_

_"Take better care of yourself dumbass."_

Blunt, loud, and nosy beyond comparison. It was annoying how Shirou could always manage to attract such people no matter where he went.

* * *

It was so loud, and bright through the crowded hallway. There was so much motion and action between the patients and their respective doctors. Garbled noise coming out from every open door going down the lane.

None of which helped with the fact the head doctor was already shouldering a massive hangover from the night before.

_'I need some pain killers.'_

The bright popping colored lights in his head felt disgustingly nauseating. He couldn't wait to struggle to not fall on his own two feet again.

"Shirou!"

It was Jem walking closer, loud voice vibrating off the cramped hallway walls his fashion and bright red hair working as a beacon in the neutral colored crowds.

"Yes?"

"Have you met the new assistant?"

"No? Did we hire one?"

_'I don't remember requesting one either.'_

"Well, we have one now. It seems she was recommended by a friend of yours."

"Friend?", well this was a new one. Who would recommend an assistant to him? Better yet who was this _"friend"_ that Jem was talking about?

Taking the bundle of papers from the disheveled redhead he could already sense an incoming headache noticing the flowy handwriting that belonged to that pain in the ass.

_'Alan.'_

"Should we-?"

Jem stopped midsentence noticing the dark expression Shirou had on as he viciously crumpled the papers mumbling quiet hushed and hot unintelligible insults.

_'Alan you son of a-'_

Stopping from continuing that insult he could only help but sigh giving a wordless nod to Jem before walking away.

_'What's the point?'_

Assuming that it was just better to accept what had already passed then amuse that pompous asshole with a reaction he gave a nod to the confused and nervous Jem blending back into the noisy crowds.

"I'll be going then, Melissa."

It'd been two hours of countless work and after seeing a monthly patient off with some sense of good news he could postpone for a break.

"Oh! Of course."

"Um, Shirou?"

"Yes?"

"Your phone is ringing."

It was loud and slowly getting on his nerves the longer he focused on the wriggling object in his pocket.

"Thank you."

"Of course," facing away from the patient that clung to her she gave a small smile before focusing back on the noisy but sweet child.

" ** _Alan_ **" pulling the obnoxious ringing phone from the coat pocket he didn't try to censor the venom coating his words all the earlier rage snowballing back with a vengeance.

"Yes, _Shirou~_?"

Alan was probably laughing on the other side of the phone, wasn't he? Without a care in the world like he usually did.

Why did this man ever seem like a good choice in terms of companionship back during college?

" **What did you do?** "

"Oh, have you received my gift?"

" **Gift?** ", the way Shirou growled sent small shivers of thrill down the blonde man's spine finding a strange jolt of pleasure and thrill in the _obvious_ face of danger.

Why should the doctor be surprised at the carefree way Alan spoke? The lecturer was similar to a cat, coy, and playful to a terrible fault.

"Of course. I only give the best to my friends."

"We're not friends."

"Hmm. Are you sure?"

"If we weren't friends I'm sure you wouldn't still have my phone number."

Before Shirou could create a comeback the call had ended abruptly.

"Great," sighing he started to realize just how tiring it was to continue being a source of entertainment for the man putting the phone away relaxing on the outside brick wall.

_'I just need to sleep.'_

Those seemed to be the last thoughts he could have before falling asleep silently nestled on the wall.

Well, he was asleep before hearing a **very** friendly and optimistic feminine voice.

"Wow! You look like shit."

_'Really?'_

His eyes narrowed, tired. After going through such an exhausting day having to deal with some random loud peppy kid on a day like this was really starting to push his buttons. It was by far too much for him and all he desired was to give this person a piece of his already tired mind.

So imagine his surprise seeing a bright-eyed young woman holding a hand out to him with a red and white peppermint. She looked so young like she was swaying in the range between her early and mid-twenties.

"Here," she was quietly mumbling her words like a flustered child who'd embarrassed themselves. Trying desperately to hide away from all of this overwhelming nonsense.

"Um! I wasn't being rude to you, I - I, you just surprised me and, and, I - I'm so sorry!"

_'So loud.'_

Flinching at her bright and loud voice he couldn't help but grimace. How could anyone be so radiating to the point it was blinding?

Taking immediate notice of the cold look in those dull blue eyes all she could do was talk mind going on autopilot apologizing over and over with sincerity laced in each one of her words. Why had she let her mouth run like this and to a stranger no less without any further thought?

The throbbing pain of his hangover kept intensifying with each word she mumbled out. Wondering and asking internally why she kept on rambling on to a stranger that didn't know anything about her.

"I'm sorry I just didn't-"

 _" **T** **hat's**_ ** _enough_** ," the need to silence her surged through an annoyed growl forced out. 

Annoying. Why were her words so annoying and throbbing to hear? They only helped to further make the pounding feeling in his head much worse.

" _O-oh._ I'm sorry," it was quiet and very hard to hear as she whispered flinching back at the way he basically growled.

"You should go, _ma'am_."

Forcing himself to be polite even when he wanted nothing more than to sleep was really starting to grind his gears.

"Okay."

She finally stopped talking he thought relief floating through taking the peppermint away from her hand before walking away.

_'So noisy.'_

It hadn't been long before he felt something clang against his head wincing in pain before looking back angrily at the same woman. Except she didn't look so bright bathing in a scarlet blush huffing like she'd been in a track race eyebrows brought down in an angry glare.

_Yet her eyes were still so bright._

"You shitty looking asshole!"

"I hope a ball drops on your head you, you asshole!"

Before he could say anything about this confusingly lunatic woman who'd dropped right in front of him she'd flipped a finger in his general direction running away straight after. Very fast might he add while yelling various amounts of vulgar and crude insults that you wouldn't expect someone that young or even female to know.

She'd already vanished turning around the corner by the time his surprise had deflated looking back at the peppermint stuck in his hand before looking at the place she'd made her exit through.

"What a strange woman."

That was all he could say before returning back, only to find that strange woman was the supposed _"new assistant"_ that had been hired here.

 _'So she's the **"**_ **_surprise"_ ** _h_ _e was talking about.'_

Well, it was Alan after all. You could never tell what that man was thinking of no matter how long you knew him.

* * *

Fate was strange indeed.

Chuckling he found these memories energetic and full of intense action.

Opening the clinic was always a solemn task. It was during those quiet early mornings when his past could sneak upon him in the strangest and most bizarre of ways.

_"If we weren't friends I'm sure you wouldn't still have my phone number."_

In a way it wasn't like that idiot Alan was wrong. Not like he'd ever want to admit that vocally but there was merit in those words. If he had wanted to be away from his past then he wasn't doing a very good job at doing it. Staying in contact with all of these people from his past.

_'Koo, Koo, Koo.'_

Kuro cried worried about his friend pecking his neck nervously and frantically.

"I'm okay Kuro you don't need to worry."

Was it funny that he could chase away everyone else but he couldn't scare away a simple bird?

_How humorous._

Finding no true value in pondering his life choices he got started on the long day ahead, moving to prepare Kuro's breakfast.

"Good morning Doctor Shirou!"

"Good morning."

It looked like he wasn't the only one here now the large crowd of workers drifting in. It'd been so peaceful and quiet too he glumly thought heading further inside to start another day. 

" 'Morning Shirou!"

Happy bright eyes and an expression full of mischief and playfulness. It looked like it was another normal day full of more of her random shenanigans.

Deciding not to pay her much heed he gave a simple _'_ _hmm'_ in reply as they started to walk together in a strange sort of beat. 

"Hey hey! Guess what I did?"

Annoying and loud she kept hounding him the moment the doors were opened, with words and jabs at his ego. Not like he cared much lending only half of an ear. 

_This_ was their daily routine.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Flashbacks, flashbacks, and more flashbacks. But seriously, Shirou is a masochist okay. He he likes to hurt himself and be consciously aware that he is. Note: I might edit the formatting again later but right now I can't really think of anything better than what's already here sorry.


	9. Shit

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Cut to Pt.2 of the whole Shirou Ogami is a walking disaster of bad decisions debacle.
> 
> But in all honesty the doctor "may" seem like a cold hearted asshole who doesn't give a fuck about other people. But only half of that is true, he's a coldhearted emotionally unstable asshole who somewhat cares about other people and just doesn't understand what he's doing at all.

* * *

_"_ _Goodness Shiro just how heartless are you?"_

* * *

It'd been hard to find this place Alan thought shivering slightly at the rain droplets that fell on his jacket. Nose starting to flush, from the cold of the night he placed a foot inside the dimly lit bar.

_'Now what could he be doing here?'_

Grinning, maybe even chuckling somewhat it didn't take him by surprise to see glowing white hair in somewhere as dark as here. It could only be Shirou with those unkept strands resembling a bunny in winter. So out of place without a sea of lab coats concealing him.

_'Well, best we get started.'_

" _Now, just what do we have here_?", upon hearing those very evident, annoying traces of pride he could already tell who this was. Nobody but the great Alan Sylvasta could say something so aggravating at a time like this, the pompous asshole.

"And what exactly are you doing here?"

Facing the college lecturer Shirou's eyes narrowed seeing, the smirk he displayed. Why was it that whenever he wasn't in a good mood, Alan held some sort of involvement?

"Well, when a friend is in need shouldn't the other be there to comfort them and listen to their pitiful sorrows?"

A cold retort was already on his lips ready to make another jab at the yellow-haired bastard. But what would that fix? Arguing with Alan wouldn't repair the already declining relationship that he'd just destroyed in under one day. 

_'Forget it.'_

Retort already dying in his throat, he caught a glimpse of Alan naively smiling as if unaware of the weight his words held before focusing back on the cups of alcohol that laid all over on the bar table. Deciding that it was just better and much more beneficial to his declining health to let it go, he continued stewing in the pot of shame.

"Just when were we friends Alan?"

"Now don't tell me you've forgotten our time as housemates Shirou? I'm quite hurt by that," the obvious fake pout that Alan had also served to irritate the already sullen Shirou.

Taking the silence to his comeback as a sign of surrender Alan settled right next to Shirou now more than ever interested in learning the reason behind this recent change in behavior. Usually, he'd be more invested in shooing him off. Just what could make the normally cold Shirou so moody and distracted?

"Besides, I couldn't find you when I dropped by."

"You say that like I asked for you to _'grace me with your presence'_."

"Ignoring your cold words, I'd like to know why your hair is so wet? Were you perhaps standing outside in the rain or something?"

Nothing, he just tossed a glare over his shoulder and went straight back to staring into space. Grinning Alan fired back with another question not letting this stop him in the least.

"So, what happened for you to be down here drinking all of this?", asking smoothly it didn't shock him when Shirou applied back with a question of his own.

"And why are you so curious?"

The smile Alan held strained slightly before reverting back, unaffected. Eyes flickering with even more interest. The normal Shirou would never respond with such a weak verbal attack at least allowing some amount of sarcasm in his tone.

"Mhm. Touché, but you do realize it'll take a while before you get anywhere near properly drunk with that annoying tolerance of yours?"

Ignored once again. 

_'Oh well, I can wait for him to talk.'_

Time passed between the two older men seated together at the dark end of the bar. Far away from any speculative eyes before the still sober Shirou broke the silence.

"So why are you really here?"

_'Now you want to talk. Cold bastard.'_

Usual smile back on he focused searching for a valid answer.

"I'm, ... here to watch as you wallow in pain and sorrow?"

_'Well, that's a new one.'_

Noticing Shirou's stunned expression he couldn't help the amused, unrestrained laugh that left him.

It'd been so long since he'd laughed so violently. Nostalgic memories of their college days flashing by.

" **Alan**." 

"I know Shirou. _I know._ "

Laughter finally dying down he flashed a simple smile to the peeved man. Taking notice of that familiar expression of irritation Alan could already sense Shirou radiating those murderous feelings similar to those college days.

"So tell me, dear friend? What happened?"

"Nothing that warrants your concern."

"You really must stop being so tightlipped about your life," head laid in his folded hands already he knew that this would be his win.

Why could he already sense a headache incoming when seeing those teal eyes twinkle even more than before the curiosity he'd kept hidden all night coming back with a vengeance.

_'Great.'_

* * *

"Goodness Shiro just how heartless are you?"

Pouting the hand that held a barely touched glass of wine swished in beat sympathizing with the situation.

After hearing everything that had just happened hours ago who wouldn't feel at loss? 

"I however find myself pitying Ms.Kagemori more. That's something only someone as cold and broken as you could do."

"I'm aware Alan."

"You most certainly do deserve to feel terrible Shirou."

How long had they both been here? Maybe long enough that Alan had gotten a few drinks into his system the usually polished professor looking anything other than his usual refined self. 

His hair was mused more than was strictly necessary. Anymore drinks and he'd be on the ground acting the opposite of his normal self. What with the blush that was coloring his cheeks. Probably from the wine he'd had the time to drink. 

_The damn lightweight._

"I know."

"Agreeing with me isn't going to get my former student an apology Shirou."

Great, now he was bordering on dead drunk and tipsy, a terrible combination for whoever sat together with him cringing at the sickeningly sweet smile he kept on. 

Poking, his finger kept probing against Shirou's neutral face babbling strings of insults, bored.

"Just why are you like this Shirou?", sighing he went back to sipping the drink, attention lost.

"Alan."

_"I am not nearly finished with what I have to say to you Shirou-!"_

He was most definitely angry voice starting to increase in range. If the fool wasn't so intoxicated then he'd be appalled by the crude words that he kept on throwing around in such a public area.

_'Good.'_

It'd be even better if he remembered all of this on his own the moment the alcohol wore off. Appaled at the many out of character things he'd done this night. It brought a smirk onto Shirou's lips continuing to ignore Alan's nonsense.

_Tomorrow would be interesting._

Taking a simple sip the alcohol tasted bitter liquid touching his tongue, eyebrows drawn together in disgust mixed with frustration. 

"Shirou you're an absolute asshole," tired, after shouting for all the bar patrons to hear while earning multiple warnings from the waiter's sleep was starting to overcome him.

_"Hey, Shirou?"_

"What?"

 _"Why'd you do it?"_ , staring back head buried in a hand his emotions were jumping all over from the way the wine made him feel.

_"Why'd you hurt Ms.Kagemori?"_

He must've looked very confused hearing all this. 

Before Shirou could form an answer Alan had moved on already asking for another glass of wine oblivious to the commotion he'd made. Especially of the anxious expression, the passing waiters held scared of getting yelled at once again.

_'I'd like to know too. Idiot.'_

Sighing shoulders relaxed, he placed the still full cup down finally tired of trying to drink these past events away from memory.

"Let's go, Alan."

"Why do I have to go?"

"I don't have the time to play your mind games."

"Oh really?"

Why was that sly smile he had sending panic signals?

"Then you should apologize to Ms.Kagemori,"

_'This brat.'_

"Your drink, ... sir," the waiter seemed to tense when handing the wineglass to Alan happily running away after.

"Thank you."

Coyly sipping the new glass of wine he was still smirking.

Why make this harder than it was bringing even more attention to them both?

But it was obvious that if they were ever to leave then he'd have to recede to the man. After all, even if he were to leave Alan here it was obvious that the bastard would get robbed on the way his little entourage of maids and butlers coming after him.

"Fine," laying the money on the table to pay for them he waited for Alan to finally move.

" _You better,_ " conceding happily proud of how everything had turned in his favor both started to walk together in stride. 

Much to the customer's obvious relief, Shirou noticed well aware of the collective sigh they gave once it was obvious they'd left.

_"So what should we do now?"_

So he wasn't that drunk smiling even more than before happy at the results of the night.

But that didn't mean Shirou planned to skip out of apologizing about everything, if groveling on the floor was the only way to convey just how sorry he was then he'd do all that for her.

* * *

_'Stupid.'_

Running a hand through albino locks all he could do was sigh watching her walk away from the front doors leading into the clinic.

Why had he amused her?

The moment those lips had made contact with his he should've stopped them from going further. What had overcome him to go further than was appropriate putting a hand anywhere on her?

_"Just take better care of yourself, Doctor."_

Those had been her final words before she'd left.

It'd be far more believable if she'd said that sarcastically or had at least thrown around a few insults before slamming the door stomping away while grumbling insults along the way.

But she'd done none of that. A whisper and then - _poof-_ she _was_ gone with the night closing the door as quietly as possible.

_Why?_

No, it hadn't been in character at all. She shouldn't have had to look so close to breaking down over something like this, the assistant he knew wasn't that weak. She'd get back up and come back grinning at him with the twice the normal force no feelings hurt insight.

At least he hoped that was true forgetting the rain that had started to come down moments after she'd left.

_"Do I need a reason to want to help you? Is it bad to want to help a friend?!"_

_"I just want to know if a friend is okay."_

_"Your not just my superior. You're, you're, .... you're my friend."_

"A **_friend_ **, huh?", he bitterly chocked out that word standing out every time those memories replayed over and over like a bad record.

Why was everyone so adamant about that saying that one word?

It was nothing more than a title so why did everyone act like it had created a link?

Bursting in and wreaking the routine - the shield he'd maintained around himself, trying to ease him into a faraway delusion where there didn't exist a cord constantly tightening around his neck with each passing year.

_What was the point of going through so much to avoid making attachments if things like this continued to happen?_

It was maddening, all the intensive planning and preparations he'd made before coming here were attempting to crumble all because he allowed himself to amuse that delusion, that growing infatuation more than was necessary.

All because he wanted to try and grow attached to others to receive those similar emotions again. To not feel so cold, not so alone.

_"You do realize that what you've done has hindered our plans?"_

That voice hissed rearing its ugly head back again ready to feast upon the damage this mess had caused.

_"Now what shall we do when we disappear again?"_

"..."

Taking the silence as a challenge the voice continued it's prodding in a similar way to Alan.

_"But you know? Her lips were soft weren't they?"_

It was grinning like a cat voice lowering down to a nearly coy tremble.

_"Don't tell me you're not going to acknowledge you enjoyed it?"_

_"The way she breathed into your mouth or maybe how it fueled some prideful part you of that enjoyed knowing you held such power?"_

None of what it said was true, all he'd done was lose himself to the warmth she gave. The way she didn't mind any of his aloofness matching right back with her own fire. They were equals and even if he was always aware of the fact that eventually, he'd have to cut her loose he at least wanted it to be in a way where they still maintained that balance.

But he was too tired to banter with that annoying voice that had taken residence in his mind pitching it's own two cents when not needed.

_"Fine. Suit yourself, but you and I both know that isn't the whole truth."_

Maybe those words held some merit.

But he didn't mind lying. Whether it be to himself or others, after all, wasn't he a liar too?

It was raining even harder than before now he finally noticed feeling the wet droplets sliding down his face. The _pitta-patter_ from the raindrops hitting the pavement in a steady rhythm noise clouding his ears. 

How long had he been here having these nonsensical thoughts?

_'Long enough that you're drenched in water it seems.'_

That comment earned a humorless chuckle pointing out just how cold it was starting to feel as he finally decided to leave the rooftop wondering if that newly opened bar downtown was still open.

* * *

"Shirou where should we go now?"

So he was awake again after everything Shirou had to drag this slumbering body through the streets. Few people awake to give them strange looks as they passed.

"Where do you think?"

"Oh let me guess ... A cafe."

"And just where did you get that idea?"

They were getting closer approaching the clinic Alan's random abundance of guesses starting to make less sense over time.

"We're here," draping the drunkard onto the door Shirou drew the keys from his pocket entering the building Alan forgotten.

"You know not many people will be your friend if you continue to be this heartless," he said following the white jacket as it swished with each step further into the faintly illuminated hallway.

By the time he'd caught up, Shirou looked very annoyed holding a bag of bird feed. While Kuro's former happy mood started to sour making a very annoying garble of noise upon laying eyes on the professor.

"Ku-", before he could start inspecting the bird Shirou cut in. 

"Be quiet or I'll kick you out."

"Of course," shutting up on point he couldn't help but grin watching the blackbird on his friend's shoulder.

"When it's morning I need you to leave."

"Is there any _valuable_ reason that I shouldn't stay with a friend for a night?"

_Friend._

She'd said that word too throughout that day, and where had it ended for them both?

Mentally scoffing he couldn't help but chuckle too tired of this long weary day to continue arguing with Alan.

"Did you just laugh?", he looked very surprised at that dry laugh wondering when Shirou had earned that part of him back. Taken even more aback at the small smile he held hidden behind a hand.

"No," he was quick to lie flustered somewhat before walking away.

"Your lying Shirou."

Oh, this was far too interesting to let go of growing more interested in the way he kept trying to hide these emotions. The Shirou he knew could be so quiet and unmoving that this recent change was becoming a growing priority to know what had spurred it on.

"If you don't stop I'll throw you out."

"But you're still smiling Shirou."

"Stop that."

"Shirou your lying again~"

"What about your servants?"

"That isn't the point I'm trying to making but I'm sure they won't mind. Now tell me why you were smiling?"

He couldn't help but sigh knowing there was a chance that he would never hear the end of this losing to Alan's annoying persistence.

Truly, why did such strange people attach themselves to him even against his wishes?

* * *

_'Oh.'_

It'd been a dream or at least a reminiscence of days prior. Shielding his eyes with a hand he sighed again. Something, he'd been doing a lot of lately before pushing upward from the couch that he laid on many thoughts running through. 

_'Where am I?'_

After tiredly taking his surroundings in he moved onto the much bigger issues trying to understand why he was no longer in the navy blue conference hall presenting the monthly check-up to the higher-ups. But rather outside of it, perplexed by this change.

"What should we do?"

Looking at the hushed voices whispering he found all of them huddling around in a little group all looking rather nervous.

"D-Do you think they noticed?", someone whispered sounding like they were on the verge of breaking down.

"I hope not," another told seeming to be tapping their foot panicking with the way they shook.

_'What's with them?'_

Growing bored of watching their exchange a snarky announcement came onto his lips ready to bark. Wanting to know just what had happened and why they'd all disappeared from such an important meeting.

"What are you-"

"Guys! He's awake!"

"Really?!"

Rushing over to where he lay they cried out worries and frantic questions forcing a recoil from the surprised doctor somewhat tensed at their closeness. Getting tired of their abundance of unanswered questions he tried to answer the ones that were loud enough to reach his ears.

"Are you okay sir?"

"Yes?"

_'Why wouldn't I?'_

"Why did you collapse?"

"I collapsed...?"

"Do you need to go home?"

"No."

Melissa and Jem seemed to be at the front of this noisy exchange eyes reflecting the questions they so desperately wanted to ask wanting to know why he'd forced himself to do this presentation with such a weak and sick body.

_'Oh.'_

"I apologize about collapsing, what about the presentation?"

How had they all fared with this sudden change in plans? Would they be okay after this little hiccup?

They seemed to all collectively relax at that answer relieved nothing really bad happened. Well, everyone but Melissa and Jem who only relaxed a bit still on edge.

"Well, that is the doctor for you."

"I'm not even surprised anymore really."

"Jeez boss, you get sick and all you can think about is work straight after."

"I suggest that you watch what you say," his eyes narrowed at the one who made that statement muttering out a somewhat threat. 

"Y-Yes sir!", the boy exclaimed apologizing straight after. 

"...," staring at the embarrassed man he muttered out a quiet _'Thank You'_ to their surprise.

Who would've thought that the usually cold head director could look so embarrassed saying such a simple thank you?

"But don't worry sir, we handled ourselves well."

"Yeah! The higher-ups didn't suspect us one bit!"

"Plus Michiru handled the presentation. You should've seen her she was so smooth!"

"... That's good then," finally rising to his feet much to their concerns warning that it was way too early to be moving around. But he paid no heed walking back to his office immersed in several troubling thoughts.

_'Michiru.'_

They hadn't had any time to talk after that _'incident'_ with the random early morning rush that had overcome the clinic forcing them all to start moving earlier than planned. Looking around overhead in the crowd he caught that familiar unreasonable tuft of hair belonging to the owner of that familiar bob of black hair.

Sensing eyes staring at her she turned quickly finding him before breaking out into a big grin. Interrupting him from formulating anything intelligible before whispering a few words resembling her usual mischievous self disappearing off on another path away from the retreating doctors.

_"Jeez, and after I told you to take better care of yourself Doc."_

Or at least that was what he'd been able to make out the noise of the busy clinic drowning her out, but that was not his focus right now eyes following her.

"Excuse me."

Before anyone could press further he'd already left following her very noticeable jacket calling out that she stop.

"Assitant!"

"Hm?"

Finally, she hears brown eyes wide and full of surprise making contact with his before stopping in place both staring at the other.

"I -," noticing the book in her hands, with how badly hidden it is inside the coat he can already tell that she's been stupidly nosy again.

"Why do you have that book?"

_'He knows?'_

"W-What do you mean? I don't have any book.", backing away nervously Michiru's mind races frantically looking for any available excuse.

"U-Um I found it a-and I-."

"Give it back **_Michiru_ **," he's annoyed wondering how she could have gotten this book after all the work put into hiding the damn thing.

"But why?"

Honestly, she hadn't gotten the time to read most of the contents. But the pages that she was fortunate enough to see already had her imagination sparked.

"I've asked before but I just want to know what you doing."

"That's none of your concern."

Hand outstretched the fact he planned on apologizing to her flew out the window with how long they stay here fighting over possession of this book.

"Hey! Are you okay?"

Concern. Why would she show any sort of care towards someone like him after everything he'd done?

"Yes," he answers quickly trying to hide any form of weakness.

"You don't look like your okay. Are you sure you should be up so-," before she can finish a headache has started the similar symptoms from earlier before clouding him.

"Shirou? H-hey Shirou you okay?", walking closer she's inspecting him looking for any sign something is wrong.

"Nevermind," he's not in the right state of mind barely standing upright without wanting to double over from overexertion so soon. Maybe he should've listened to everyone about being careful. After all, he did just faint earlier he thinks eyes becoming dull as his concentration slips. 

"H-Hey Shirou?!"

She gets no response the man trying hard to focus on not collapsing onto the ground breathing heavily.

They stay just like that hidden amongst the chaos of this noisy clinic in this dark hallway. 

"Shit," one of them whispers finding this situation even more ridiculous.

Just what the hell were they both doing with their lives right now?

Must be what they're thinking right now.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Well, this might be the last time I write in Shirou's pov. Well for now at least.
> 
> Also if you're wondering what the whole voice talking bit is. Don't read into it to much it's just Shirou's trauma and fears manifesting into a form because upon other things this author can't write.
> 
> So here's another chapter I wrote with no plan at all. Tell me what you think about these types of chapters

**Author's Note:**

> I couldn't keep this idea out my head so it's going to be a bit of an oneshot. Or not.


End file.
